Barry Bonds is in the news again and there is no bigger pariah in baseball whose last name doesn't rhyme with Blemens than Barry. Seems as if the MLB Players Association is investigating why free agent Bonds isn't getting any offers. MLBPA head Donald Fehr is even throwing around the C-bomb. No, not that one, I meant 'collusion'. So, as expected, his detractors are being quite vocal. San Francisco Chronicle blogger "The Betting Fool" snidely lists the reasons Bonds isn't being signed:
- Too old? Check?
- Too much money and a hard-ass agent who will want more than his client is worth? Check.
- Is mostly worthless in the field? Check.
- Is mostly poison in the clubhouse? Depends which one, but mostly a check.
- Possible impending trial on perjury charges? Double check!
Sour grapes, I suppose, but if my team's last viable offensive player had been cast out of the clubhouse like a trollop, then I'd be pretty sour myself. Sorry Giants fans, you're nothing without Barry.
My favorite part of the blog entry is the photo caption: "Barry tends to draw a crowd, which can be a major distraction for other teammates." You know what else tends to draw a crowd? A SUCCESSFUL TEAM THAT WINS GAMES!
My colleague analyzed Bonds' unemployment last month and I think we both came to the conclusion that a handful of American League teams should offer the guy a few million bucks to, you know, make their lineup more gooder. Tampa? Seattle? Kansas City? Want to compete? Here's your chance.