They're playing baseball in caves out in Joplin, Missouri, and attorney and local nut David Riesenmy is to blame. Riesenmy and former major league pitcher Steve Luebber have taken a fifteen acre underground facility once used for paintball and transformed it into the "Cave of Dreams Baseball Center". It's 65 degrees and dry all year round, as opposed to normal Missouri weather, which fluctuates between 'shitty' and 'shittier'. Local kids can practice all sorts of skills:
The center includes two long batting tunnels with pitching machines, a soft-toss cage, two clay pitcher's mounds and two portable mounds, and open areas for practicing other skills.
Sounds good for the winter time, but what about during the spring and summer when kids just want to play outside? Other good uses for the Cave of Dreams during the summer season:
- Storing all that Red Sox wine so it ages properly into a delicate swill.
- Off day retreat and hibernation station for Cubs
- Bat storage for the Kansas City Royals (ed note: get it? bat? haw haw!)
- Opportunity for Kyle Farnsworth to turn it into a modern day Lascaux.
- Teaching Jim Thome the difference between stalactites and stalagmites.
Or just turn it back into a paintball center. Those flyover states really eat that shit up.