Mitch Williams Has a Potty Mouth, Line of Boutique Salsa

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Former Phillies reliever Mitch Williams is very protective of his 10 year old daughter, enough to curse out a female ref at a CYO game and possibly get banned from future contests. I guess those fifth grade girls in Catholic Youth Organization basketball games in Medford, NJ can get pretty physical, because Mitch was getting pissed about all the non-calls on his daughter:

"I'm emotional when it comes to my kids. What I saw happening was completely unfair."

Translation: "those f***ing bitches are hand-checking my little girl!" You call that an apology, Mitch? How about a little penitence here? Maybe a tiny mea culpa? Ron Martin, who heads the referee organization, isn't accepting Mitch's apology:

"(If Williams) is going to appear at any games next year, we will not officiate them. If he enters the gym in the middle of a game, we will stop officiating. A lot of people challenge calls, but when someone hits on one of the magic words, we can't tolerate that stuff."

Well how the fuck is Wild Thing gonna sell his salsa now?

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In an attempt to keep pace, celebrity salsa pitchmen Don Imus and Paul Newman recently suplexed the Monday night bingo caller at Our Lady of Perpetual Grace.

Not to be outdone, Pedro Martinez beat up the cockfight umpire.

In all fairness, the ref looked a lot like Joe Carter.

C'mon, he pitched three years at the Vet. I'm surprised he didn't beat the ref with her own shoes. That place can change a man's outlook and add some colorful words to the vocabulary.

Right after this happened, Jon Stewert impregnated a Hooters girl.

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