Texas Girls Vying To Chase Frank Catalanotto's Balls

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Laurie Fox wrote a great and evocative piece for the Dallas Morning News about Rangers Ball Girl tryouts. It's a textbook example of how to make an entertaining story out of a little piece of preseason whimsy and humanize the participants while making your readers smile. I highly recommend it.

So of course, I'm going to copy and paste all the things that sound vaguely sexual!*

  • Their primary responsibility is to chase down balls

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  • They can't be afraid to sacrifice their bodies for the sport.

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  • Several of the girls could not get over the size of Hank Blalock's bat.

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  • During the Sunday tryouts the players bounded and lunged across the emerald grass, stopping line drives. Then, with determined faces, they each whizzed the ball back across the field.

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  • A hopeful Rachel Smith said she hoped to standout from the field by catching balls in her mouth.

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    *I made up two of these.

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"Mr. Morgan said featuring strong female athletes on the field during the game sends a message of respect."

And it sends a barrage of boners.

"I made up two of these."

Probably the one about girls "whizz[ing] the ball back across the field." Everyone knows girls can't throw.

Robin Padgett has being playing with balls since she was 4 years old... its her passion!

This is all well and good, but please tell me someone has seen a San Francisco Giants telecast...they use elderly men as the ball-boys. Non-stop comedy.

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