Baseball Before Bed Time: Sleep On The Left Side

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sleep.jpgHere's what happened in baseball while I left the right side free:

Detroit 6, Minnesota 5: Detroit rubbed some more sleep out of its eyes, hit 4 home runs and strung together back to back wins for the first time this year. Carlos Guillen, Gary Sheffield, Maglio Ordonez and Miguel Cabrera all went yard. Cabrera's two run job in the 8th put the Tigers ahead. Pulitzer nominee Todd Jones got his second save, but not everything was sunshine and rainbows. Starter Nate Robertson left after 6 1/3 with arm tightness. Meanwhile, hey uh... Minneapolis, what's up with your bullpen?

Diamondbacks 8, Giants 2: Micah Owings gave up a single run in 6 innings to improve to 3-0 and the Slithery Ones became baseball's first 10 win team. Chris Young and Conor Jackson both hit homers. The Giants didn't get a whole hell of a lot out of starter Kevin Correia and when that happens, they lose. Tune in for the final game of the series this afternoon when ICARANE glogs it.

Red Sox 5, Cleveland 3: The Sox once again spotted the Indians a lead for awhile before Jason Varitek's pinch hit ding-dong gave them the lead in the 9th. Hideki Okijima came in for the save, and thousands of usually happy go lucky Cleves despondently hurled themselves into another unforgiving night of despair. If they're not careful, they're going to get a complex.

Marlins 4, Braves 0: Scott Olsen went 7 scoreless to dispatch the Braves. It doesn't seem like very good planning for Atlanta to have lost one game by 4 runs instead of dividing that up into 4 separate 1 run losses, but what do I know. That's why I just sit here in a crotchless Superman outfit and write game recaps with a ballgag in my mouth, instead of run a team! The Marlins seem to be delaying their widely anticipated collapse one day at time. Such focus is admirable.

Yankees 5, Rays 3: Hideki Matsui used PornoPowerâ„¢ to knock one out of the yard and Alex Rodriguez hit his 400th career double, which I believe ties him with Jody Reed. This was one of a handful of two game series around the league this week. I find it highly annoying to read that a team "completed a two game sweep." That's weak sauce. The Yankees have two guests on the way to New York. Both of whom command followings of great reverence but also dabble in decadence and periodic hypocrisy. Of course I speak of the Red Sox tomorrow, and the Pope on Sunday.

We're gonna let it up like India House on fire!

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Nothing like getting shut out by a guy who has been drunkenly tasered.

Stupid Braves.

You love name-dropping me in your blogs.

I'd almost feel bad about beating Cleveland twice if I didn't remember some choice comments from the Tribe while they were up in the series last year.

Then I drink some road champagne.

I feel like the fact that Jed Lowrie had 3 FREAKING RBIS in his WIDELY anticipated debut was left out of this recap purely to spite me.


Maybe there's an extra special Jed Lowrie post coming up later this morning.

You love name-dropping me in your blogs.

You're not supposed to tell people you're Jody Reed!!11ONE!!

I feel a strange urge to rip up a photo of that asexual skinhead-imagery poseur Morrissey.

CTC: If that was true, wouldn't there be more double posts?

I wish we could all be livin for 1990 like Jody.

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