Baseball Before Bedtime: Sleep Delays My Life

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Here's what happened in baseball before dreams complicated my life:

Brewers 8, Cubs 2: If you followed the liveglog, you know what happened in the first seven innings. Not much changed in the last two: the Cubs couldn't hit much or field very well, Ron Santo kept groaning and sighing, and Jason Kendall kept hitting. Kid went 3-for-4 with two RBI and a stolen base. One thing about Santo as a broadcaster: he sure likes to joke about his diabetes and his amputated legs, which leads me to believe that it's a defense mechanism. Perhaps it's actually worse to root for the Cubs than it is to lose your legs below the knee.

Braves 10, Pirates 2: Rookie Jair Jurrjens pitched a gem in what was a close game until Atlanta unleashed the dragon, or rather a seven-run eighth inning. Mark Teixeira and Yunel Escobar provided the power and commenter Matt_T got a free pack of baseball cards! And free parking! This is what happens when only 17,000 fans show up for a game.

Reds 6. Diamondbacks 5: The boo birds were out in force for Cincy third baseman Edwin Encarnacion in the bottom of the ninth, as he effed up his task of laying down a sacrifice bunt with his team down two runs. Eddy, you tried your hardest and you failed miserably. The moral is: never try. So he stopped trying to bunt and hit a walkoff three-run home run. Hooray! Says teammate Brandon Phillips: "He can't bunt for shit. But he sure can hit." Hey, that's the lyrics of 50 Cent's new hip-hop jam, "Bunt Fo' Shit".

Royals 4, Tigers 0: The Tigers vaunted and much bally-hooed offense runs into the pitching prowess of former Met prospect Brian Bannister. You know what they say about former Met pitching prospects: they go on to perform very well for other teams. Bannister pitched seven innings and gave up but two hits, not bad for some nerd who scored 800 on his math SATs. Bannister's performance was good enough for me to replace him on my HACKING MASS team.

Blue Jays 5, Yankees 2: Let us not speak of this contest.

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Fortunately for Mike Mussina owners, the Jays managed to kill 3 rallies with double plays. Burnett continued where he left off last season, which means the Jays need to make the most of this season before he opts out and the Yanks throw Bobby Abreu money at him. And how about that shot that Damon took away from Rios? If Lexi was smart, he would have hit it where Melky's went the night before. Who knows - perhaps cheap dingers aren't his style

Mind you, if Abreu could hit the side of a barn - or at least throw the ball at home plate and not 10 feet up the 3rd base line, the Jays would have had 2 runners cut down at the plate.

Accardo would have still struck out A-Rod, though

Baseball Before Bedtime, featuring guest commenter mathesond! Thanks for the assist.

+1 Mathesond

So by "let's not speak of this" you meant, someone else speak of it, at length?

Also, "Bunt fo Shit" is Juan Pierre's new at bat music. Should he ever get an at bat.

I have visions of a terrifying new future in which your World Series teams are the Royals and the Nationals...

I don't know why people got so excited about this Tigers offense in the first place.

The free parking came with the free field level tix I won.

Does anyone want a JoJo Reyes card? I'll mail it to ya

Always a pleasure, gents. I'll miss tonight's game (New Age hippie book club meeting), which sucks, as McGowan/Hughes could be a long-term rivalry along the likes of Stieb/Morris...

Matheson- Dusty McGowan might not even make his start tonight, due to having bird-flu-like symptoms. Oh, check that, just regular flu-like symptoms. Pandemic now!

How come nobody is talking about the Phils-Nats barnburner last night? Tim Redding is the new Bob Welch. It is difficult to root for this Phillies team without loathing them at the same time.

Yeah. I need to get around to the Nats at some point today.

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