Baseball That Happened Before Bedtime: I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

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Here's what happened in baseball before I took a trip to Sleepytown:

Marlins 5, Mets 4: Pedro Martinez pitches three miserable innings and then decides the fourth inning would be a good time to pull a hamstring and leave the game. In New York, this is called "pulling a Clemens". The Mets' pen holds down the fort and lets the Mets' offense tie the game at four but it all goes to shit when Matt Wise gives up a walkoff home run to Marlins third basegentleman Robert "Who?" Andino. You only get one "first Major League homer" and Andino used his WISEly. ZING!

Angels 9, Twins 1: The newest Angel of Anaheim starter is Jon Garland and he was fucking efficient against the light-hitting Minnesota lineup. Only seven baserunners in eight innings? Damn, we'll be home in time to watch the 10PM news. Oh by the by, Minnesota's favorite ex-boyfriend went 0-for-4 with five Angelgentlemen left on base. But he certainly heard many huzzahs and hoorays!

Rockies 2, Cardinals 1: The day after rain negated three innings of actual baseball, the Rox and Cards sent out their second-string Opening Day pitchers. Surprise surprise though: Kip Wells and Kyle Lohse were somewhat serviceable for their respective teams, tossing a combined 10 and 1/3 innings and letting in just one run. Yadier Molina's solo homer was all for naught, though, as Troy Glaus' throwing error allowed the tying run to score; reliever Ryan Franklin walked in the winning run in the 8th.

Yankees 3, Blue Jays 2: I was at this game and it was awesome. That is all.


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