Derrick Goold Loves Major League, Geena Davis' Utility

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St. Louis Post-Dispatch blogger Derrick Goold covers the Cardinals with fervor, but don't count out his passion for cinema. Today, he uses his knowledge of baseball movies to create an ideal baseball roster of fictional characters in film history:

* Starting pitcher: Steve Nebraska (The Scout)
* Strikeout setup man: Henry Rowengartner (Rookie of the Year)
* Closer: Rick "Wild Thing" Vaughn, of course
* Catcher: Crash Davis
* First Base: Clue Haywood (Major League)
* Second base: Marla Hooch (A League of Their Own)
* Third base: Dottie Hinson, a position change until Crash retires
* Shortstop: Benny "The Jet" Rodriguez (The Sandlot)
* Left field: Shoeless Joe Jackson (Field of Dreams, if he's hitting righthanded, it's fiction)
* Center field: Willie Mays Hayes
* Right field: Roy Hobbs
* Power on the bench: Dennis Haysbert. Yes, the actor, Mr. President, see he can be two bats for one roster spot -- Max "Hammer" Dubois (Mr. Baseball) and Pedro Cerrano (Major League).
* Defense, speed, promising talent to nurture: Esquire Joe Callaway (Bingo Long)

I ain't got no squabble with the team, except why would one force Geena Davis' Dottie Hinson to change positions? (Giggity giggity) She's a far better catcher than Kevin Costner's Crash Davis, and I bet she's not afraid to block the plate. Heck, even John Candy in Brewsters' Millions was a better catcher than Costner.

So who would be a better fictional third baseperson? Besides Troy Glaus...reports show that he is, in fact, real. My vote is for Ed.


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4 Comments

Needs more Chet Stedman.

I'd put a motivated Roger Dorn (Major League) at 3B with none of that "Olé bullshit" when at the hot corner.

Either Dorn at third or move Michael Keaton's character from Gung Ho over from short. Hey, if A-Rod can do it, Keaton can.

Steve Gendison, Fake Yankee catcher from Seinfeld, could make this a real Murderer's Row.

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