Scott Rolen Reads Classic Literature, Still Self-Destructive

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Blue Jays third basegentleman Scott Rolen has been hanging out in Florida rehabbing his borkened finger, an injury he suffered during infield practice in spring training. Poor Scott has had a pin surgically inserted into his middle finger and is still expected to miss a few more weeks. Hey Toronto Star blogger Cathal Kelly, how's Rolen been biding his time?

    I ran into Rolen in the tunnel underneath Camden Yards. I knew things were going okay when he immediately stuck out his hand to shake - that is, the hand with the broken finger. Then I asked him what he was reading. "Still (Upton Sinclair's) The Jungle," he said. Good to know he's not wiling away his days in Florida on the couch.

I wonder how long ago Kelly and Rolen last spoke. In other words, how long has it taken Rolen to read The Jungle? Let's Google it.

Googling...Googling...Googling...

And here we are: Rolen has been reading the same book for nearly two months. Yes, it's it's 480 pages long, but Scott Rolen has nothing better to do with his injured finger keeping him from fielding grounders or taking batting practice.

What was the impetus for choosing such a book? This is a Very Serious Novel that describes the suffering of the early 20th century 'have-not' immigrants toiling away in the meatpacking industry at the hands of the corrupt 'haves'. Maybe Scott thought he was checking The Jungle Book out of the liberry. Oh, that fun-loving Baloo!

Full disclosure: I've never read Upton Sinclair but Camp Tiger Claw has, so there.


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15 Comments

Prince Fielder probably read this before he turned veggie.

Prince Fielder probably read tried to eat this before he turned veggie.

That fattie.

Fuck you, HTML! How dare you reject my tags?

Toronto should start a monthly book club. For August, may I recommend Chinua Achebe's Things Fall Apart.

What this book presupposes is, what if he didn't?

September: To Have and Have Not

Scott Rolen is so emo.

Now: Great Expectations

Was he reading the actual book or is he still trying to get through the cliff notes?

@matt_T

Wildcat...wiiildcat...I'm gonna go.

October: The Classifieds (John Gibbons only).

@ Matt_T and Farthammer:

Scott Rolen's been out walking. He doesn't doooooo too much talking these days.

@Clare

Did you just call me Coltrane?

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