Showing Kai How To Throw A Hatchet: Today's Afternoon Games

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  • 1:05, Cardinals at Brewers: The untouchable Kyle Lohse (!) takes on my boy Manny Parra in the final game of this two game tilt. The Cards won last night thanks to the continued pitching anti-heroics of the Brew Crew bullpen. It broke the hearts of all Brewers fans, except for the ones sitting in the swank new section at Miller Park called "Toyota Tundra Territory." Each cushioned, reclining seat has two flat screen TV's. The section's name comes from the fact that the people sitting here will weigh as much as a truck.



  • 2:20, Mets at Cubs: Yesterday I mistakenly said that the Cubs were traveling to Shea. Sheesh is it hot in here (runs finger around collar)? Luckily for Major League Baseball, no one takes their traveling cues from me and everyone was accounted for at Wrigley. Southpaw underachiever Ted Lilly takes the hill against super happy Nelson Figueroa. Lilly says he is "losing patience" with his recent performance. Imagine how everyone else feels, dude.

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35 Comments

Billy Wagner showed up at Shea after reading your entry.

Rick Ankiel has been benched three games in a row?

What gives?

That's the kind of info YOU put in a post. I just make fun of fatties.

Tony LaRussa can suck it if he thinks he's getting away with benching my hubby. Commence hatching of sinister plot... now.

Craig Counsell is starting at short for the Brewers today. JJ Hardy was taken out back and shot.

I have an irrational hate for Counsell and his helicopter swing.

Looks like Ned Yost is taking lineup "Counsell" from his veterans this season.

Is the pun thing over?

Lohse is finally getting shelled. 4-2 Milwaukee in the fourth.

Oh no... looks like he might Lohse!

mmm... low-hanging fruit is so tasty.

7-3 Brewers in the bottom of the 6th.

Lohse will do that. He will get you all excited with a few good starts and then he will crap the bed for 6 or 7 in a row. He is a very frustrating player to have on your team.

WHAT A LOHSER

It looks like the Cards are making a come back. Once the Brewers are into their bullpin their chance of holding a lead is GAGNE.

bullpen

Pujols walks on 4 pitches with the bases loaded

Failure to overcome even a 4-run deficit again the Brewers' miserable bullpen would be a Cardinal sin.

Please let the Brewers win this one or else Uecker will commit furri-cide.

The Brewers will need more then just Braun and Heart to win this game.

Top of the ninth starts now. It's 8-7 Brewers and Nodding Ned Yost is bringing in Eric Gagne (6 saves, 3 blown saves).

Izturis, Schumaker, Ankiel to bat

Not to mention he has an ERA of 8.22

SUCK IT AND GAG ON IT BREWERS BULLPEN. GAG ON THE CARDINALS BASEBALL DICK.

Sorry, got a little carried away there.

HBP for Izturis. I don't know much about Izturis in my expierence, middle infielders with a hispanic background are usually pretty fast so it's probably not a good idea to hit one to open the 9th inning while holding a one run lead.

Hit batsman, single, runners at the corners and none out....here comes Ankiel!

Usually pretty fast, yes, but there are exceptions to that rule.

Cough cough Robbie Cano cough.

Yes that is one. Juan Castro is another.

Pujols reaches as Weeks fucks up the relay throw on a would-be double play ball.

Run scores.
Game tied.
Save blown.

gag knee sucks knee

Ludwick walks. Lead run on 2nd now.

The game would have been over if the Brewers play in the fied(er) wasn't so week(s)

Glaus K's.
Extra innings.
Crowd boos.

Not extra innings....they're going to the bottom of the ninth. My bad!

field(er) Stupid!!!

Gagne Fructis blows
Brew Crew regrets investment
10 million a year

Baseball Haiku's?

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