The Real Erik Bedard Finally Stands Up; Sits Back Down Quickly With Hip Pain

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creepy-scary-trees-thumb564746.jpgSubliminal tension and worry are not hallmarks of good sportswriting. Creeping paranoia is not something one should take away from a newspaper recap of a baseball game, but I'll be damned if that's not what I'm picking up in a lot of the writing about Erik Bedard's performance against the A's last night on Sunday. This is from Grumpy Geoff Baker's story in the Seattle TImes:

Bedard is known for ringing up hitters, having fanned more than 200 of them last season to lead the AL. But a nagging hip injury, which put him on the DL after only two starts -- one of them delayed a couple of days -- had caused no end to the hand-wringing and debate amongst fans about the February trade that brought him here from the Baltimore Orioles.

It didn't help that two of the trade's centerpieces, Adam Jones and George Sherrill, came back to haunt Seattle in a tough loss earlier in the week while Bedard sat on the sidelines watching. Nor that the team won't disclose exactly what is causing the inflammation in Bedard's hip, despite swirling rumors the injury is more serious than anyone is letting on.

But aside from some early rust, which led to two of Bedard's four walks issued on the night, the hip didn't appear to be a factor.

Oh, those swirling rumors. They fly in on the winds of dread and whistle through the trees at such speeds that you can almost swear they're saying, "Oooooh. Hip inuries don't tend to resolve themselves very well in pitchers. Ooooooh."

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I definitely have Saint-Saƫns' Danse Macabre stuck in my head after reading this post. Can we start a new trend called Gothic Sportswriting?

Carl Crawford, never flitting,
Still is sitting, still is sitting
In the dingy Tampa dugout just behind the first base line...

Erik Bedard is going to fall down in the shower and shatter his graham cracker hip.

BOOOO! This isn't even a story, it's a giant blockquote. CTC jumpered the sharkz.

Someone get the kid a Life Alert (TM).

Didn't the A's beat Fernandez yesterday, as opposed to Bedard?


When did Washington Irving start the Mariners beat for the Seattle Times?

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