- 2:00, Mets at Yankees: Today's wacky two park doubleheader starts in Da Bronx With Mike Pefrey taking on Dan Geiss. I'm not that familiar with Mr Geiss's work so I asked an expert for some insight. He said: "oh dan geiss 8==========D." It's a weekend subway series y'all, and these teams stink worse than Chinatown!
- 4:00, Cubs at White Sox: These two bickering neighbors pick up where they left off last weekend. Well the White Sox hope not exactly where they left off. Getting swept is tiring. Please to enjoy Ryan Dempster vs. Jose Contreras.
Manhattan looks like a penis. Brooklyn/Queens is a hand. Staten Island? You guessed it: jizz.
/work
There's a vas deferens between the Bronx and Downtown.