Yahoo! Sports' Jeff Passan has uncovered one of the secrets of the locker room and he was good enough to share it with us, the reader. Mariners outfielder Ichiro Suzuki knows how to say naughty words in English and uses them to soil the reputationpants of National League All Stars on a yearly basis:
"Every year, after the AL manager addresses his team, Ichiro bursts from his locker, a bundle of kinetic energy, and proceeds, in English, to disparage the National League with an H-bomb of F-bombs, stunning first-timers who had no idea Ichiro speaks the queen's language fluently and making returnees happy that they had played well enough to see the pep talk again."
Whoa, whoa, slow down there Jeff...an H-bomb reference when talking about Ichiro Suzuki? I know it was 60 years ago and I know it was an A-bomb, but perhaps you could have chosen a different bon mot in your lede? And later on he quotes Miguel Tejada who wonders if Kosuke Fukudome will do the same thing for the National League. Migs, just because they're both Japanese doesn't mean they are both sick, perverted men who like to collect schoolgirl panties. Only one of them is.
Potentially tasteless jokes aside, I take severe pleasure in knowing that Ichiro is a foul-mouthed sonofabitch who does not shy away from busting down walls between cultures and breaking the ice between veterans and rookies. Passan claims that Ichiro's blue pep talks have helped the AL win all seven (make that eight) All Star Games he has participated in. I just wonder, does Ichiro call Billy Wagner a cunt every year, or is that just me?