Nationals 2, Dodgers 1: Derek Lowe's complete game gem went for naught as his Dodgers were held down like a naughty dog and allowed to score but one run against a bevy of Warshington pitchers. Heck, L.A. got runners on base, but Nats third baseman Ryan Zimmerman started four double plays; Zim killed more rallies than the Denver police force.
Indians 10, Tigers 4: Cliff Lee has nineteen wins against just two losses for a mediocre Midwestern team. If he doesn't win the Cy Young, I'll eat my hat. Ben Francisco's two tater tots picked up the slack for outfieldmate Grady Sizemore.
White Sox 8, Orioles 3: The South Siders are riding the Obama convention bounce to a tidy AL Central lead. Starter Gavin Floyd went eight strong and helped his team improve to 18-8 in his 26 starts. Selfish infielder Orlando Cabrera had four hits and two RBI.
Blue Jays 6, Rays 2: After three losses in his first three starts against the UPSTART Rays, Roy Halladay finally got his shit together and put a Roy Halladay-style beating on the kids from the F-L-A. Fella only went six innings but hey, Vernon Wells and Rod Barajas both hit a ding-dong to support the cause. WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT, ROY?
Red Sox 7, Yankees 3: Mike Lupica was right about one thing, that being: "Mike Lupica is an enormous douchebag". Okay, maybe Mike Lupica didn't really say that about Mike Lupica, but you better believe everyone who reads Mike Lupica or works with Mike Lupica or sells coffee to Mike Lupica agrees on one thing, that being: "Mike Lupica is an enormous douchebag". I don't know what that has to do with this game, except I will probably be wearing a Red Sox hat this weekend as part of a silly bet.
Phillies 8, Mets 7 (13): Another day, another former Nats reliever blows a big game for his new team. This time, Luis Ayala earned his role as a stinky Mets reliever by giving up the game-tying RBI dubble to pinch-hitter Eric Bruntlett with two outs in the bottom of the ninth. The Mets blew a 7-0 lead in this game. I have no jokes for this.