What's Up Creampuff: Dudes That Got Hurt

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stretcher.JPGThe losses are piling up. You can't get back on the field long enough to help. It's frustrating you to the point that it's not just affecting your game, but it's souring your personal relationships. You know things would be right again if you could just shake this one nagging injury. You've still got it. All you want is a chance to be healthy and prove it. Then some dipshit with an alias calls you a creampuff.

  • Todd Jones, Tigers: Apparently Todd has been pitching with pain in his shoulder for the past few weeks. What a warrior! Letting his pain diminish his effectiveness instead of just telling the team and going on the DL. His MRI revealed no structural damage, just inflammation and tendinitis. I hope this doesn't affect his commenting.

  • Nomar Garciaparra, Dodgers: Despite what Rob would have you believe, the Dodgers did have a shortstop last week. His name was Nomar. He is a few steps slower than his prime but he's familiar with the position. He'd been playing with competence but sustained a mild MCL sprain. He's not on the DL yet, just day to day. It's ok, Manny will rub Sportscreme on it. Or frosting. Manny can't tell the difference.

  • Alexi Casilla, Twins: Kid was a sparkplug at second for the Twins until tearing the ligament in his right thumb. You see this type of injury all the time in Xtreme Hitchhiking but rarely in baseball. Superstar Adam Everett gets the nod at 2B. If Casilla opts for surgery, his season is over.

  • John Maine, Mets: Maine has a strained rotator cuff. Scariest part of the story for Mets fans?

    "After last night's game, Pedro Martinez provided a chilling assessment of the injury. Martinez finally had rotator-cuff surgery at the end of the 2006 season, despite pitching with the problem for years. And when told how Maine described his own pain on Monday, Martinez nodded."

    Uh ohs. Will Pedro have company under the mango tree?

  • Khalil Greene, Padres: This moron fractured his hand punching a storage chest. It's a vicious cycle. The pills make you punch storage chests and break your hand, but you have to take the pills so your hand heals. Greene says he was frustrated at his poor showing at the plate this year. This is what San Diego gets for hiring a storage chest as hitting coach.


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8 Comments

I only take pills so the framed picture of Abe Lincoln in my bathroom will stop talking to me.

What?

Its all a over up. Todd is on the DL with a fractured heart.

No worries, Padres--you have Matt Bush ready to step in at short, right? What?

CTC doesn't think Adam Everett is very good, you see.

Ouch, Gorgie. Ouch.

Everett is actually backing up Harris as SS. You were right about one thing though. He is a super star.

Then some dipshit with an alias calls you a creampuff.

You horrificly anonymous coward of a blogger, with your sarcastic, cutting remarks and utter contempt for journalistic integrity.

Quick Draw = Buzz?

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