It's your second creampuff of the week. Boy am I glad that I got all those other wimps out of the way earlier in the week. It's the first time I've ever done work early instead of procrastinating. Good thing it was for a fucking blog where I use a pseudonym and not like, school or work or something.
Mike Lowell, Red Sox: Lowell is also making a a return engagement on the DL. This time it's with a strained oblique muscle. The Sox were forced to move Kevin Youkilis to third. Youk has responded by hitting the ball so hard that blood is coming out of it. Get well soon anyway, Mikey. I sent you balloons.
Dan Giese, Yankees: Dan Giese fell victim to the Greg Brady Tiki Idol curse that has touched nearly the entire Yankee squad. He has a shoulder boo boo which could pave the way for the return of Phil Hughes. Those should be an electrifying two starts.
Joel Zumaya, Tigers, Andruw Jones, Dodgers: Thanks for trying guys. Why don't you just come back next spring and we'll try this again.
Chris Young, Padres: Young's hard luck season just got worse as he lands on the DL again, this time with a forearm strain. Happened to Popeye a few times. His sinker was never the same.
- Brad Penny, Dodgers: