MLB Releases 2009 Schedule, Idiots Talk About It

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goats2009.jpg Rob: hey CTC, the 2009 schedule is out!
CTC: I saw that.
Rob: isn't it early?
CTC: Well they got a new delivery boy.
He's foreign. Real hard worker.
Rob: I guess this gives fans of teams out of contention something to look forward to.
amirite, Orioles fans?
CTC: I guess.
I wouldn't know.
Rob: zing.
CTC: Anyway, you know what's not early?
Opening Day.
Rob: thank god!
maybe the weather will actually be nice this year when I go to Opening Day at New New Yankee Stadium...when is that?
CTC: Um. Lemme look here...
Rob: April 16th
CTC: Yeah!
Rob: the final home opener among the 30 MLB teams
save the best for last, eh?
CTC: Well, they want to make sure all of the bribery trials are over before first pitch.
That would look bad for NYC.
The Sox make their first visit to the Park in May.
One of those two game series we despise so much.
Rob: awful
not enough time for Dustin Pedroia to get down to FAO Schwartz and dance on the huge piano
CTC: ASK JEFF FRANCIS WHO I AM
Rob: any good interleague series of note? I see Phillies at Yankees in May
CTC: Dodgers-Angels could be a natural rivalry that's a WS rematch.
Rob: i see Rays at Mets in June
CTC: I wouldn't put money on it, but it's possible.
The Metrodome's final Opening Day is April 6.
Plenty of parking for your snowmobile.
Rob: they play the Mariners. Hope they bring extra blankets for the moose.
CTC: April in Minneapolis is like August on Pluto.
Rob: i see Toronto returning to Philly in June
CTC: By that time JP Riccardi should be building a contender with the Brockton Rox.
Rob: also, when i do the drop-down menu on the MLB website, it lists a team called the "Devil Rays"
that's gonna cost someone a few million dollars
CTC: Any parks you'd like to go to that you still haven't seen?
Rob: i would like to go to San Francisco to see Corporate Telecommunications Park
CTC: That is a lovely park.
I've never been to Skydome.
Rob: ROGERS CENTRE
CTC: I want to go there and pay my tributes to the Wrestlemania VI Tragedy
Rob: i dont know what that is
i also dont want to know
CTC: Oh well you see The Ultimate Warrior was taking On Hul... oh. Ok.
Anyway should we talk about some other teams that our readers care about?
Rob: no, screw them
CTC: Fine with me.


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19 Comments

So, still no August in review then?

It's like Waiting for Godot, if written by Todd Jones.

Rob, go to SF and get a Cha Cha bowl. Everyone will tell you to get Garlic Fries, but they are mindless lemmings. While eating said Cha Cha bowl, you can use the stadium's wireless connection to blog about it.

pfffft unless its in magnet form, I don't care about the schedule.

CTC: Well they got a new delivery boy. He's foreign. Real hard worker.


Tiger Claw and Kornheiser, seperated at birth?

HERES YOUR AUGUST REVIEW THATS WHEN I STOPPED HITTIN 400 IT'S A GREEK TRAGEDY.

This is not journalism.

@ Chipper

Did all the Greeks cry when you stopped hitting .400?

It'd be a Greek tragedy if CTC didn't get a Cha Cha bowl. Those are god-damn deeelicious. Plus the Cepeda shack (home of the Cha Cha bowl) sells the cheapest beer in the bleachers: $7.25 Tecate.

@Stats

NO MY Q RATING IS PRETTY LOW IN THE MEDITERRANEAN MY AGENT IS WORKING ON IT MAYBE A NEW LINE OF SNEAKERS OR A SPICY BABAGHANOUJ.

WOW roadtrip to Skydome! I'll take you past the corner that the Ultimate Warrior used to pan on.

See you in May, Lloyd.

Walkoff Walk: Toronto Pants Party
Exile on Bloor Street

I am just about to book my tickets to San Fran for the Twins at A's June series.

Well I'm going to Toronto because I heard they have lax extradition laws.

Well I am going to San Fran for the world class Trannys

I'm going to Toronto for the percocets.

Rob: Can I borrow a feeling?
CTC: Could you send me a jar of love?
Rob: Hurtin' hearts need some healing.
CTC: Take my hand with your glove of love.
Rob: Take my hand with your glove of love.
CTC: JINX
Rob: lol

I'm going to Toronto for the Shim like strippers. No, wait. That's A-Rod, who is going for that reason.

Wow, second series for the crew is cubs at home. We don't play in wrigley till july it seems.

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