Weekend Answers to Questions Nobody Asked

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burningcandle.jpgEach weekend during the playoffs, I'll attempt to answer some questions about the playoff games that absolutely nobody asked or ever would ask. This could be fun and uninformative or this could be painful and uninformative. Either way, it's another listicle in the listicle-ful sportsblogosphere.

Well that certainly was a ballgame, wasn't it? A million pitchers threw a million pitches, the teams combined for 7 dongs in a game that lasted 327 minutes. In the end a 23 year old pitcher that saw his first big league action less than one month ago got the win while a 42 year old pitcher took the loss.

On to the questions!

  • I thought these guys were supposed to be good? Good they were. Scott Kazmir and Josh Beckett were good, but they didn't come in pitching that way. Each man was a study in inefficiency; falling behind hitters, relying on their fastballs and leaving stuff up and over the plate. The two big studs got touched for 13 runs between them, giving up three home runs each. Not pretty from the "aces" that aren't really aces. James Shields and Jon Lester are the class of these rotations.

  • I thought these guys were supposed to suck? Suck they did. Dustin Pedrioa and Evan Longoria were sucking, but they woke up just in time to ignite their offenses. Pedroia scored 4 times, knocking himself with two tater tots despite coming into the game 2-20 in the playoffs. Evan Longoria started the playoffs with two tots then went 1 for his next 13 ABs. He dingered and laced two doubles to the left field corner to power the Rays offense.

  • What's wrong with David Ortiz? Plenty. He looks completely out of sorts at the plate, not making good swings at all. He walked three times, which makes it easier to swallow for Sox fans, but it is incumbent on him to swing the back and drive in runs. I'd like to draw some conclusion about him missing Manny's protection, but it just wouldn't be intellectually honest of me. Nobody to blame but himself right now.

  • Does Joe Maddon owe his life Dan Wheeler? Absolutely. Dan Wheeler was off his ass. He pitched three and a third innings of sparkling relief, the only blemish was a wild pitch that Dionner Navarro could have done more with. After Price, there was only one Ray in the bullpen, and he barely counts. Wheeler saved his team after Kazmir's short start put so much pressure on the bullpen, which got 17 outs. The only question remaining is Will Wheeler be able to pitch again Monday?
Tough act to follow National League. Let's see you bunt your way into that kind of business! Tonight's Gas Face recipient? The TBS exec. that greenlighted 8pm starts and extra-long commercial breaks. 5.5 hours is too damn long for a baseball game, and stay off my lawn your no-good kids.

Remember kids, Sooze will be here to glog your pants tonight while I give thanks and eat turkey. You're jealous, admit it.

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Correction: Rob is glogging tonight and Sooze tomorrow night.

"After Price, there was only one Ray in the bullpen, and he barely counts"

Harsh words for a guy who won 14 games and had a league-average ERA.

Harsh words indeed, but nobody around the Rays, blogger or otherwise, wants to see him with the ball at any point. He's either lights out or beyond terrible.

True. And the fact that Wheeler threw 3 1/3 and was followed by a guy with 125 professional innings tells us all we need to know about Jackson's spot in the pen.

Still, how much d'you figure he'd get in arbitration? A mil? Two?

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