Here's what happened in Philadelphia while you were snuggled in bed with your pajama pants and teddy bear:
- A Phillies fan robbed a bank in a quest to get some cold hard cash to pay for Phillies playoff gear at a Modells store. No telling whether he posed with a Red Sox hat and a Youuuuuuk sign before he left.
- A drunk driver slammed into a police cruiser in Center City, sending two police officers to the hospital with neck and back ouchies. What's up, Officer Creampuffs?
- The fire department extinguished a dumpster fire outside a Starbucks. Mistakenly, of course, because the Phillies fans were just roasting some Italian beans for the morning commute.
- According to Phillyburbs.com, "Windows were smashed at a bank and luggage store in the downtown shopping district. At least two cars were overturned, the windows of a TV van were smashed, dozens of huge streetside planters were flipped over and some bus shelters were damaged or destroyed," but police still have no total number of arrests made. Here's a hint: you'll need three digits.
- And if you parked your car on Broad Street last night, you got what you deserved:
I'll call my sister later this morning to see how the Art Museum neighborhood held up last night.
Picture stolen from my boss, A.J. Daulerio of Deadspin

Soooo, if you're really going to a cooking blog in the offseason I have a name suggestion: Bakeoff baked.
Should people have done any of this nonsense? Absolutely not.
But for a city of questionable national repute such as Philadelphia, which has waited 25 years for a championship and endured countless heartbreaks along the way, a smattering of smashed windows and overturned cars isn't a worst-case scenario. I haven't heard any reports of actual injuries or assault, which is a big plus.