Baseball Scribes Wag the Dog

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scumicane.jpgCan you believe the luck of the baseball writers of America? Forced to endure the foul weather of early fall in Southern California, then they must contend with public enemy number 1: Scott Boras. He has the audacity to, walk into a room and answer their questions. It is all the ink-stained wretches can do to keep track of the hilariously preloaded sound bites, throw the quotes around the phrase "Boras holds court" and make it to the tee by 1pm.

I understand, as Geoff Baker said, that winter meetings are boring to cover, especially the GM meetings which are generally more about rules and policy changes than player movement. So when Scott Boras orchestrates his kangaroo court, the reporters come running as the Seattle Times' Larry Stone describes:

One of my favorite rituals of winter and GM meetings is the strategic arrival of super-agent Scott Boras in the lobby. He plants himself in the middle and waits for the influx of reporters to surround him -- and it doesn't take long.

We just had that magic moment -- and considering that Boras represents Manny Ramirez, Mark Teixeira and Derek Lowe -- among 16 free-agent clients -- it was the usual feeding frenzy.
So the reporters crowd around the agent-come-brand, squeeze in a question about a local player to form the body of an article (Willie Bloomquist? He's a 30-team type player. He can help any club!), type it up and head back to the hotel for the night. The editors get their column inches, Boras' clients get their name in the paper (over and over again) and the fans get to curse Boras' name while the rest of the players line up for his representation.

Why are the beat writers complicit in this boring charade? Of course Boras is going to say ridiculous things about Manny being iconic, or that TOO MANY teams are interested in Mark Teixeira. I'm doubt any writers or the GMs he baits believe a single word that comes over his forked tongue and out of his mouth. He's an agent! His job is to convince people that they can't live without his clients' valuable and/or market-adjusted services!

It isn't news, it isn't factual. It's a sales pitch printed in the newspaper. Consider this gem regarding Jason Varitek:

"When the Red Sox win," Boras said, "they make a lot of money and the franchise and network (NESN) increase in value. Jason Varitek's largest role is about winning."
A money quote like that is entertaining, but that doesn't keep it from being complete horseshit.

Photo via Lenny Ignelzi/AP by way of

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Scott Boras is the sluttiest girl at the cotillion.

Jason Varitek's largest role is about winning.

What does that even mean? Is he an actor now? Will he be picking up the roles vacated by Joaquin Phoenix?

He puts food on the Rem-dogs table dammit. Do not question The Boras.

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