If Jake Peavy Goes To Atlanta Will He Take A Midnight Train?

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From the very tiny desk of Ken Rosenthal, on very tiny paper comes news that the Braves are super duper close to getting Jacob Zeus Peavy (not his real name).

The Braves are on the verge of a trade agreement with the Padres for Peavy, according to CBSSportsline.com, but the Padres have yet to communicate their acceptance of a Braves' offer to Atlanta officials, major-league sources say.

It is possible that the Padres have decided internally to proceed with the Braves, then finalize the details later Thursday. The teams spoke again on Wednesday, continuing discussions that have lasted for over a month.

The Padres, according to CBSSportsline.com, will receive shortstop Yunel Escobar, Class A outfielder Gorkys Hernandez, either right- hander Charlie Morton or left-hander Jo-Jo Reyes and either reliever Blaine Boyer or one of two minor-league left-handers, one of whom is Jeff Locke.

See ya, Jo-Jo, see ya Blaine. SEE YA GORKYS. At least the Padres are going to up a Fruity Name Percentage (FNP) that was 14th in the NL last year. And for the Braves, this solidifies their position as the third best team in the NL East.

You get the feeling, however, that Ken doesn't really believe all of this by the way he repeats "according to CBSsportsline.com" like a tic. Talk amongst yourselves. I'm hungover.

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I like starting with Yunel Escobar (goodbye, Khalil-bot 5000), but after that, I dunno ... Matt, care to enlighten me about some of those names?

Gorkys is fast probably another year away but the team was really impressed with him.Jojo and Morton are similar. Young, flashes of brilliance but inconsistent. I'm more impressed with Morton who throws harder too. Boyer is a worthless piece of shit. He eats a lot of innings in middle relief but he's maddening to watch

Thanks. Maybe they're finally realizing that in a park where only a legendary retired 'roider could routinely hit it out, you might want to get some guys who can steal some fucking bases.

I didn't even Know that the kid from Life Goes On played ball!

Don't talk about Phony Gwynn that way, Root. He's a good kid.

Sorry I had bird flu today, WoWies.

Jake Peavy was shade-grown by collectivized Ethiopian farmers.

I wish I was a proprietor of a cash cow website like this one so I could get drunk on Wednesday nights

You don't have to be rich to do nothing. I got a cousin who's broke, he don't do shit.

You are related to Jiegel?

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