The Dutch Oven: Undermining Your Wife's Ability to Feed Your Noggin

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Why the dutch oven? Because the term 'hot stove' needs to be retired. This feature will attempt to give you a listicle-driven source for all sorts of off-season baseball rumors. If you have any suggestions, rumors, or recipes that I can cook in my dutch oven, email us

  • Billy Beane is ___ Rebuilding: Some people seem to think Matt Holliday's stay in Oakland is merely temporary. Others seem to think he's a key part of making the A's contend in 2009. Tune in later for some Hot Knives coverage of the trade.

  • Orlando Hudson Will ___ Become a Blue Jay Again: Some people seem to think the Blue Jays should bring back Orlando Hudson. Others seem to think he's an overpriced version of Aaron Hill whose defensive skills have fallen off of late and who wears a ridiculous double earflap helmet. Tune in later to see the Mets sign him for 4 years and $60 million.

  • The Nationals Made A ____ Trade: The Marlins sent starter Scott Olsen and outfielder Josh Willingham up to Warshington, D.C. in exchange for someone named Emil Bonaficio and a coupla minor league pitchers. This immediately makes the Marlins a significantly less talented team and the Nationals a slightly less bad team, meaning that both will end up at 71-91 in 2009.

  • Trevor Hoffman Will ___ Go Into the Hall of Fame in Five Years: The Padres withdrew their 2009 offer to closer Trevor Hoffman, meaning that the all time leader in saves will not be returning to the team. Fella made $9 million last year and the team initially offered him $4 million, so I guess they never really wanted him back. Will he retire now or go on to be the Mets closer?

  • The Mariners Will Hire a Manager With ____ Experience: Here's a quick list of finalists for the Mariners skipper job: White Sox bench coach Joey Cora, Boston bench coach Brad Mills, Boston third base coach DeMarlo Hale, Arizona coach Chip Hale, St. Louis third base coach Jose Oquendo, Oakland coach Don Wakamatsu and San Diego Triple-A manager Randy Ready. That's a who's who of nobodies, meaning the Mariners are thinking outside the Ken Macha/Bobby Valentine/Bob Brenly same old same old box.

  • Rinku's a Lumberjack and He's ____: JB sir took Rinku and Dinesh to eat breakfast at their local Denny's, and then they went to see the latest Guy Ritchie picture RocknRolla. They gave it two thumbs down, saying, "it was supposed to be big action, but it was no action at all. At least the seats were very comfortable and the theater was very clean."

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Little known fact: Emil Bonaficio is the only veteran of the Bay of Pigs invasion to make a major league squad.

Dinesh's blog post title: Rock and No Rolla. Zing!

I think they're getting the hang of this blogging thing.

How did you make it through that Nats/Marlins trade without fallizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

A Guy Ritchie film that sucks, post-Snatch? Color me surprised.

A Guy Ritchie film that sucks, post-Snatch? Color me surprised.

No, his movies started to get bad before he divorced Madonna.

I see what you did there!

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