Holiday Questions

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Hey kids, lock the door.

  • IS Mark Teixeira going to sign on New Year's Eve so that none of your loyal WoW editors will be in the proper state to write about it? Wait, I think they celebrate New Year's on a different day in Canada so maybe Lloyd can do it. In any case apparently the Nationals have increased the.....zzzzzzzzz

  • WHAT is the Christmas list equivalent of wanting Brian Fuentes since you couldn't get Mark Teixeira? I'd say wanting a bus pass since you couldn't get a car.

  • DO you know who else writes about baseball and the human condition? Geoff Baker. This piece, and accompanying photos are pretty great.

  • WILL you be making a New Year's resolution? I haven't in a long time. I usually find the whole idea kind of self defeating, but this year I'm changing my tune. I am making one. My resolution for 2009 is to meet Joe Perry. If you have one, please leave it in the comments.

  • HOW will I feel, if sometime during the holidays Manny signs with the Yankees? It's not exact, but I assume it will hew pretty closely to Red's prediction over at Surviving Grady.

  • IS the headline proofer already on Christmas break at the NYT?

  • DO you know what the worst part about the offseason has been? We've hardly been able to say tater tot, funny bone, ding dong, tetratot or king dong. At least the new year will mean we're closer to a new season.

This seems as good a time as any to thank all of you that made Walkoff Walk's first year of existence a happy and successful one. That goes out to everyone that reads and also to our blog brothers and sisters that helped spread the word about what we were doing. I'd also like to thank the people who just stop by for pictures of Lobster Baby. I wish you all nothing but the best for your holidays and that we'll all share a new year that is better than this one.

You know if something crazy happens we'll stop by here and let you know, but otherwise consider yourself (and us) on vacation. We'll see you on January 5th. Take good care.

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What happens in times like these is that ice and snow on rooftops can break off and come hurtling at the pedestrians below. Often, these boulders weigh over 100 pounds and can kill you. I'm serious and it's happened in plenty of cities before.

That is as close as Geoff Baker gets to "Happy Holidays."

I'll take it.

Teixeira to Yankees. Santa just took a shit in my stocking.

My New Year's Resolution is to stop lurking here.

Like the holidays in general, my resolution is sure to be followed by regret.

Welcome, Bournigal! Now just tell us who your favorite team is so we know how to shame you later next year.

Thank you, Walkoff Walk! Without you, we would never know the miracle of lobster baby. (Also, your baseball coverage is excellent, but it's even better when there is a baby dressed as a crustacean.) Happy holidays!

Bournigal, you now have to pick up a cherry with your butt, drop it into a beer mug, and chug it.


And then wash all that down with a cakie and a double-double.

That sounds so good right now...In n Out it is for dinner.

I might have to grab Five Guys tonight, so I don't feel left out of the delicious burger craze that is sweeping the WoW nation.

I cannot begin to tell you guys how much I've enjoyed this wacky blog. Kris, Rob, and all my commenting brothers and sisters: Kudos, thank you, and Happy Holidays.

I still hate Jose Vidro, however.

Rob - My team is the A's. Except for Reggie Jackson. He can go to hell.

Farthammer - This sounds suspiciously like the initiation ritual in use on the Supreme Court....

I’ve always wanted to do the 9 dogs and 9 beers in 9 innings…so that’s my New Year’s Resolution...that and eat healthier.

Holy crap...Bournigal I love you.

Maybe someday, we'll sign up a Marlins fan commenter.

Maybe someday, the Marlins will have fans.

I've got nothing really to say Baseball related until March.

So, Happy and Safe Holidays to all you Wowers.

Merry Christmas, WoWies. May Santa bring you everything on your Amazon wish list and may your front offices keep ticket prices the same.

p.s. I made Cakies last night. I ate three of them before I went into a diabetic coma.

Since the Yankees have so many fans, maybe you can take some of them and give them to the less fortunate teams like the Marlins.

100 fans to be split up among the least-liked 15 teams should send a cold, hard message to the Bombers' front office about hoarding fans and really balance the rooting field.

Clare, how were they? I assume eating 3 means they were good.

Hey kids, I can't tell you how much sexier I look now that I have a mustache comb.

Christmas Miracle, indeed.

I got a framed picture of Yankee Stadium, taken by a friend of a friend, and taken from the space shuttle. Technology is awesome.

What about the CC, AJ and Tex jerseys?

Along with the Great Wall of China, the Yankee payroll is one of only two man made objects visible from space.

You can see my post-xmas gut from space as well starting at 8pm PST.

Rinku and Dinesh on Chrismas:

I think that may be my favorite blog post of all time

Best line ever "very crazy american festival"

My favorite part was "Santa sir"


That's positively awesome.

This site ain't pretty to look at, but probably worth visiting to pass the time:

Giants sign Randy Johnsozzzzzzzzz

Giants sign Randy Johnson to one-year deal. If we weren't on a break right now, the blogpost title would read, "Giants Get Gifted Geriatric Great".

Santa dropped me a Ryan Braun t-shirt for xmas :D

too bad we can't get some good players over here off the market >_>

I wish the holidays wouldn't get in the way of in-depth analysis of the Willy Taveras-as-Reds-lead-off-hitter situation.


I got one of those mini-wine fridges that can store up to 6 bottles at a time.

Just to go back to the delicious burger craze that is sweeping the WoW nation, my brother bought me an In-N-Out burger t-shirt for Christmas.

I received a few shell fish costumes for Christmas. Expect some disturbing pictures, Iracane.

I had my first Five Guys burger last night. Got the Regular Cheeseburger which has two patties.

Got sauteed mushrooms, onions, ketchup, mustard and pickles. Very good. No In-N-Out, but what really is.

I will still argue that Whataburger comes close to In-N-Out, but like CTC said it's no In-N-Out, but what really is.

What about Goodburger?

Real Christmas Conversations:

MDT: So I'm baking cakies tomorrow.
MDT's Girlfriend: Cookies?
MDT: Nah, cakies. They're like cookies except with cake mix.
MDT-GF: Ooh, those sound delicious. Where did you get the recipe?
MDT: Off the internet.
MDT: Uh, no. They're from a guy named Farthammer.
MDT-GF: ...What?

Red Sox to sign Brad Penny and Josh Bard to one year deals. I find these moves analogous to covering the nail holes in my college bedrooms with shitty caulk jobs the day I moved out.

Five Guys just opened their first outpost in Chicago. Does going there count as my New Year's res-WoW-lution?

I did a lot of shitty caulk jobs in college too.

Five Guys is a pretty good burger, but their fries are my favorite. We also have Fatburger, where you can get a fried egg on your burger, which is pretty rad. There's a new chain called Bob's Cheeseburger that had a good burger, and great onion rings.

But I still haven't been to an In-and-Out

hang on a second.



better now

I guess if the Mets could convince L.A. to eat most of that ridiculous contract, then it might be worth a shot. There is some chance, I suppose, that Jones might lose 100 lbs or so and be useful as a good-not-great defensive outfielder. Long odds, but if you're not paying the freight, then why not?

Matt, I've only recently checked out DeadOn, but I've enjoyed catching up on the Morning Rock posts, especially. Nice work.

The Jays signed Michael Barrett to a minor league deal! Teixeria my balls Iracane!

There are many great culinary experiences that I had while living in Spain in college, but the easiest to replicate is putting a fried egg on a burger. Easy and very tasty.

@matt: There are many great culinary experiences that I had while living in Spain in college, but the easiest to replicate is putting a fried egg on a burger. Easy and very tasty.

@self: Artard.

Thanks Gorge!

How can Ben Gibbard write sad songs now?

I figured WoW would liveblog the first 24 hours of the MLB Network.

I bet it will start with a music video by The Buggles.

Any conversation about adding things to hamburgers has to include the burger at Otto Mosers in The Cleve. Comes with a half inch apiece of fried salami and provolone on top along with thick slices of raw onion. As my man Kool-Aid says, Oh Yeah!

Kostas' Cafe made a Greek burger: 1/3 lb patty, topped with a half-inch thick piece of feta cheese, sauteed onions, on grilled sourdough. Add steak fries. Oh, and a salad. To keep it healthy.

And you know any player nicknamed the Big Unit will be a hit in San Francisco.

I think Santa brought me complete indifference to the rest of this offseason.

Where is this Kostas Cafe, and do they ship burgers to Atlanta?

Kostas was in Salt Lake City. Closed, but not forgotten.

In the last 3 months, they have opened up 2 Five Guys within 10 min of my house and 3 more within range of my office.

My New Year's resolution is to be able to breathe on my own by the end of '09.

I am sure CTC can whip one up for you.

No Tsaziki on that burger?

Phillas, have we ever talked shop on Oasis Grill? If so, forgive me. If not, go there.

Looks like it's hot dogs wrapped in puff pastry and smothered in stadium mustard for dinner tonight. Yummo!

Farthammer, we never talk anymore. You've become so distant.
I will drown my sorrows in a platter from Oasis Grill.

It's not you; I just need space.

Tell Mohammed you want a falafel/chicken shawarma combo. Get extra hot sauce too; don't be a pussy.

Nice to see WoWies still active while we are hibernating. Merry New Year, everyone!

@Rob, I will celebrate Merry New Year with some beef jerky

Beef jerky time!

Angels sign Fuentes and the Indians traded for DeRosa and now Chicago is back in the Peavyzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

God, Jamie Lee was so hot before we found out she has a penis.

I will celebrate my New Year's Eve by going to the farmhouse of a flamboyant gay friend of the Future Mrs. Wahoo. In the middle of farking nowhere. With a bunch of couples I don't know. Including her boss. Overnight. Please kill me.


Are the names of some of these people Professor Plum, Mr. Green, Miss Scarlett . . .?

Seriously, hide the candlesticks.

In college we had a burger joint called The Madison Bear Garden, or "The Bear" for short. Two incredibly awesome concoctions at The Bear were the Shack Burger (1/2lb patty topped with 1/2lb of pastrami and swiss) and the Jiffy Burger (1/2lb patty topped with peanut butter).... both awesome awesome!

While I like In-N-Out, we have a newcomer to the Northern Cali burger scene called The Counter. Freakin' phenomenal, plus sides that include onion strings, sweet potato fries, and deep-fried pickle chips.

Those pickle chips have launched a thousand ships.

@ Colonel: Your last name isn't mustard, is it?

Mark DeRosa? I think Cleveland plans on playing 8 men in the infield this coming season.

Bournigal, where is The Counter?

Travel channel is showing the "greatest fried foods" in the country. The first three were the Hollywood Cafe in Tunica, Mississippi; Dyers in Memphis; and Rutt's Hutt in Clifton, NJ. I've been to all three restaurants in the last three years.


There's one down on the peninsula somewhere, like Menlo Park or Palo Alto. The newest is in Walnut Creek, though, on California Blvd a block north of Civic.

I'll be spending new year's eve at a wedding reception on Treasure Island. Should be quite nice, thankyouverymuch.

Well I'll be darned. I live in Los Altos. I will go there this weekend.

Phillas, who gets married on New Year's Eve? That's actually genius now that I think about it. "What? No, I can't go to your NYE party that costs $180 to fight through 300 people to get a drink. Why? It's my anniversary."

New Year's means party at mine. Gang's all here.

Derek Lowe will not be prominently involved. I'm already a little drunj (misspelled on purpose).

Just like the Cubs, the Blackhawks can't seem to win at Wrigley.

The MLB Network, so far, is a smashing success. The old-timey ads mixed in with the Larsen perfect game footage is worth the price of admission.

I have a crappy almost-no-name cable provider... and can't switch... and that crappy provider does not carry MLBN. I am weeping.

The MLB network is airing the Smoltz/Santana duel from last year at 3pm.

This is the game that Weintraub wrote his first purple prose about

Yeah, I am liking the new MLB Network so far too. I thought with Bob Costas in studio with Larsen and Yogi there would be a lot of Yankee fellating, but it was good. I need to get me some of those thar fancy new razors from the ads. The Hot Stove show has potential too. Could a WoWie field trip to MLBN studios be in the cards in '09?

Field trips are for housewives and schoolgirls. I'm going to break in with a rape kit. WATCH YOUR BACK, ROJAS!

We can bring school girls with us on our field trip? Cool. I'm in.

Wahoo, I made your stew last night. It was awesome. I then watched Miller's Crossing. Awesome as well.

I'ma making stew today.
Maybe I'll put a bowl aside for Manny when he arrives in SF.

Glad you enjoyed it, Fartie. I started Atkins so my diet is pretty odd. And it isn't possible to be cooler than Gabriel Byrne was in that movie.

I'm gonna take the taco for weirdest diet. I'm about to embark on 6 days of that lemon juice and cayenne cleanse, with no solid food. Wish me luck.

Yes, New Year's was that poisonous.

CTC is actually Beyonce.

I've contemplated doing something similar, but it sounds so labour-intensive. I've got a lot of pizza sitting around that needs to be tended to.

I'm pretty interested in seeing exactly what I crap out after the liter of salt water I'll be drinking each evening.

This is definitely something you can only do if you don't live with your girlfriend.

I used to fast when I worked out seriously. Mine were three-day water only fasts. I was usually pretty tweaked out by the afternoon of day three. The really amazing thing is how small your stomach capacity is when you do eat again.

I work out all the time, but eat all the time. So I have muscles, but they are hidden in fat that never grows or goes away.

This stuff doesn't taste so bad.

I had short ribs with bacon risotto last night. Today, I feel like 80% of my blood has been replaced with pork fat.

Ever have fries cooked in goose fat? I'd kill someone's child for those right now.

This stuff doesn't taste so bad.

What CTC doesn't know is that we've secretly replaced his cayenne pepper melange with Folgers Crystals. Let's see if he can tell the difference!

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