The Dutch Oven: Smells A Little Like Success, A Little Like Burning

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Why the dutch oven? Because the term 'hot stove' needs to be retired. This feature will attempt to give you a listicle-driven source for all sorts of off-season baseball rumors. If you have any suggestions, rumors, or recipes that I can cook in my dutch oven, email us

  • John Smoltz Finally Works Up the Courage to Fly the Coop: Rumour has it that lifetime Brave pitcher John Smoltz is on the verge of signing a one-year deal with the Boston Red Sox. The 41-year-old is coming off a season marred by surgery. Braves beat writer Dave O'Brien is so down about the whole thing, he quoted a Hank Williams song. The whole song, natch.

  • Red Sox On Verge of Ruining Lloyd the Barber's Dreams Too: Reports have the Red Sox about to sign former Rays OF and patron saint of Ghostrunning Rocco Baldelli to become the team's fourth outfielder. The Rhode Island native is to be in Beantown tonight for the Boston Baseball Writers Dinner where he's getting the Tony Conigliario Award for being awesome, so it's just easier to sign with the Sox without having to make another trip.

  • John Patterson Retires From Baseball: The man is six days younger than me and he's hanging up his spikes. That makes me feel pretty damn old. John Patterson had a pretty awesome 2005 season where he went 9-7 for a terrible Washington team and posted a 130 ERA+ with 185 Ks. As per his Wikipedia page, he married the 2005 Miss District of Columbia last year so he's got that going for him.

  • I Don't Like Rumours, But Hey, It's a Slow News Day: Ken Rosenthal is reporting that all-time saves leader Trevor Hoffman is on the verge of signing with the Brewers. With Salomon Torres' retirement and the complete disappearance of Eric Gagne, this is a worthy risk to take for Milwaukee. As for Hoffman, the groupie factor goes way down from San Diego levels. Oh well.

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Cheer up Matt. Andruw may be on his way back to Atlanta, which is kinda like Santa Claus comin' to town, except fatter.

And instead of presents, he brings 200 strikeouts

assuming he's healthy (not a fat piece) enough to get 200 at bats.

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