8 Reasons Why Baseball Sucks: A Dissertation

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Let me introduce you to Normalboy64. He prefers NASCAR over baseball and is sick of people talking trash. Some morons, like Steve Czaban, hate baseball because they are Neanderthals whose frontal lobes are dead to anything but extreme violence, flashing lights and loud noise. But not Normalboy64, he's got a list of 8 specific reasons he doesn't like baseball. And they'll really make you think. I may not even like baseball myself anymore.

With the NASCAR angle you may already be dismissing Normalboy64 as a redneck. But I don't think rednecks listen to French Jazz-Folk. I love this video.


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20 Comments

I say they hate baseball because they hate America.

/Czaban is still better than Mike and Mike in the morning.

7. It's full of FATTIES

So, he's obviously self-loathing or has never been to a NASCAR event in person.

He's right about #7, if he's referring to the press box.

Not sure about Nascar, but that song is pretty frigging gay.

That guy is just pissed that no one walks to the plate or runs out from the bull pen to the stylings of some French Jazz-Folk band.

Josh: I'm much better at video hockey.
Paul: That's not a sport.
Josh: It requires hand-eye coordination.
Paul: It's not a sport if you don't sweat.
Josh: What about golf? It's a sport and you don't sweat.
Paul: It's not a sport if you let a machine do all the work.
Josh: What about car racing?
Paul: Shut up, Baskin.

I'm in class right now so I'm imagining, as I do with every YouTube when I can't listen to audio, that the video is set to the Benny Hill theme.

Works every time.

100 games may be a lot of games, but NASCAR actually has the longest season of any 'sport'

BATTLE ROYALE!!!

This video

vs.

This Video

c'mon Kris, not even close. The "top 10 teams" video is Hulk Hogan to the "8 reasons" video's Barry O

Go figure - I've always thought NASCAR was boring...

Not boring? The guitar work in that song. daaammmmn

Clearly you guys have never seen my list of "top 10 underage hotties" set to "Candys Room".

@Chief, Chris Hansen would like to see that list of yours

Now if you'll excuse me, Edith Piaf and I have a date to go cheer on our favorite, asymmetrical baseball conference.

On the other hand, baseball and NASCAR both strongly emphasize the importance of proper left-turn technique.

Dammit Maury, I'm not an ambiturner

they're not fatties, they're baseball players. wait, is it "fatties" or "athletes?" either way, still right.

Maybe baseball does suck, but at least it's a sport.

Attention all NASCAR fans: Driving is NOT a sport. It's a way to get to work in the morning.

Oh, and that background song is "Muita Bobeira" sung by Brazilian jazz singer Luciana Souza. BAM, hillbilly!

Clearly I have been wasting my life. If only Normalboy64 had told me sooner...

100+ baseball games a year is boring, and a car driving in 250 circles would be... Captivating?

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