Dominican-American Hero Alex Rodriguez Out Until May, World Weeps

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Alex Rodriguez' brother Joe, via ESPNDeportes.com reporter Enrique Rojas, via Big League Stew's Duk's Twitter feed is reporting that Alex will have surgery to remove a cyst on his hip. He'll miss ten weeks recovering and won't see action again until May.

"It's a big blow for the whole family. Alex is destroyed," Joe Rodriguez told ESPNdeportes.com. "We were all very excited to see him play with the Dominican Republic in the World Baseball Classic.

"But the most important thing is to have a successful surgery so that Alex may continue his career."

Obviously, America is devastated to hear that our most beloved athlete, nay, our most beloved celebrity will be out of commission for such an extended time. The entire Dominican Republic will be miserable knowing their national hero won't be able to compete in the WBC. And worst of all, the friendly New York media will be stuck thinking up clever back page headlines with Alex recovering in private for such a long time.


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18 Comments

He can't possibly come back from this. Orca-n he?

Let the Angel Berroa Era COMMENCE!

I blame Madonna for this.

HIP TO BE ALEX
I'M HEALTHY, ALEX IN-CYSTS
YANKS TO BE DE-VOID OF A-ROID
HIP HIP BOO-ROD

Someone get Angel Berroa out of his jazz trio and on the hot corner.

A-ROD: CEASE AND DE-CYST

Well...I hope the Indians call the Yankees and let them know that Andy Marte is available : )

A-ROID SHOCKER:
HIP BLIP TRIPS DIP

Any chance of Scott Brosius coming out of retirement? Hell at this point I'll even take Mike Pagliarulo.

GAMES MISSED WITH LAME CYST; YANKS TANK?

Is this is kind of like when Michael Jordan "retired" for a year when he got busted for gambling? I smell a conspiracy.

If he comes back late may he will miss roughly 50 games

If half of those games missed are home games, Yankees season ticket holders will be paying approx $17,856 for 25 games without their superstar. For Upper Deck. Obstructed View. Standing Room Only.

Now for some A-Rod haiku:

On the steroid list
Now it's at least a month missed
Can he blame a cyst?

@Honeynut
But they still Got Melk.

Is this the same physician who diagnosed Giambi's parasite?

Poor Yankees fans. Now they might have to wait until - gasp! - Memorial Day to boo the piss out of Alex Rodriguez. Maybe the booing will build up until the day he returns, when the almighty bronx cheer chorus will stop the subway system in its tracks...

this news is very depressing. Maybe listening to some Morrissey will cheer me up.

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