What else would we at Walkoff Walk do except provide a recap of a game that happened 10,000 miles away while we were sleeping and didn't watch? Team Japan, playing on their home turf at the Tokyo Dome, took down Team China 4-0 in the opening game of the WBC. Pitcher Yu Darvish held the Chinese hitless for four innings before being pulled due to extreme boredom. Shuichi Murata hit a two-run happy jack in the third inning off China starter Chenhau Li, part of a three-run outburst that basically decided the game.
So, how did the MLB representatives for Team Japan fare?
Ichiro, who batted only 3-for-23 in exhibitions leading up to the tournament, went 0-for-5 while fellow Major Leaguers Kosuke Fukudome (0-for-0, 4 BB, 1 R), Kenji Johjima (0-for-2) and Akinori Iwamura (0-for-4) also went hitless.
There's only one explanation for these four players going a collective 0-for-11: they're too Americanized! Fat and lazy! Coca-Cola and Lee Jeans! Need better work ethic! Still, that Fukudome character can take a pitch, amirite?
Team Japan will next take on the winner of tomorrow's South Korea-Chinese Taipei tilt, while China takes on the loser. If Japan wins again, they advance. If China loses again, they're doneskis. This iteration of the WBC is double elimination; it's not following the silly round-robin format from three years ago that allowed Japan to lose two games in Round Two and win the whole sack of potatoes.

Coca-Cola and Lee Jeans
Since when Ichiro a Reds beat writer?
WHERE WAS THE LIVEGLOG? I set my alarm and everything.
I guess the Grand Marquis couldn't make it to Tokyo.
If Mr. Baseball taught me anything, oh has it ever, it is that Japanese players have a secret pitch called a Shuuto. Also, never stand your chopsticks into your noodles. It's rude.
Jack Elliot is my hero.
Misterahhh Baseborohh!!
I heard that George Wendt collided particularly hard with Kenji Johjima in the seventh and they ended the game prematurely.
I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Chinese Taipei
Where were the dirty knees?
HEY! WHICH ONE A YOU SLANT EYED SONS A BITCHES TOOK PEE PEE IN MY COKE?
LISTN YOU WANTA KNOW WHAT I THINK OF ALL THIS I BET YOU DO? IF WE KEEP GIVING ALL OF OUR GOOD JOBS (LIKE BASEBALL PLAYER IN TEH WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP CLASSIC} THEN) HOW ARE WE GONNA GIVE JOBS
TO AMERICANS THAT USED TO WORK FOR FORD MOTORS AND BANKS AND THE CHINESE RESTRAURANT UP THE STREET THAT CLOSED L
FED UP,
TODD JONES
-TODD JONES
I miss your musk, TJE.
@TJ, They Took Our Jerbs!
comment jack
A-Rod out til May
http://deadspin.com/5164875/alex-rodriguez-needs-surgery-out-until-may