We don't have much time today; I'm sure there are long distance phone calls to make, fritatas to nom, war profiteers to haphazardly purchase flowers from, and mothers to acknowledge. We should rush straight into last night's great stuff before we realize we're old as dirt with hair on our tongues.
Angels 1, Royals 0: Zack Grienke lost! He lost a game! He's over, he's been exposed. The complete game four hitter he threw together wasn't good enough for the W; meaning it had no intrinsic value. What a failure. The Angels won their third in a row as the reinforcements continue to stream in. The Texas Rangers, who yesterday claimed victory by holding the White Sox totless, turned the trick again today. The tables were turned however, as the Sox themselves held the only team more dependent on the home run inside the park to claim the victory. Young stud and overlooked lithe lefty Derek Holland pitching 0.1 of an inning. No joke Rangers, he's good. Why don't you go ahead and shoot him some more innings.
Mets 10, Pirates 1: Carlos Beltran responds well to flattery.
Tigers 4, Indians 0: The Tribe's bullpen doesn't respond well to being pressed into action. Fausto Carmona learned walking 6 men in 6.2 innings isn't good for business, it really isn't good for anybody. Back to back home runs and more walks than Ks wasn't good for my Duel of the Day prediction Felix/Franky matchup.
Reds 8, Cardinals 3: The Cards have dropped two in a row, Albert Pujols is 0 for his last 10, and Rick Ankiel is still experiencing general body soreness. Were I a Redbirds fan, I'd be afraid. The Brewers have nothing to fear when Yovani Gallardo's around. 100 pitches in 5 innings isn't making the best use of your time, but limiting the Cubs to 2 runs over that span will keep you in cheese for weeks.
Elsewhere: The Toronto Blue Jays, conscientious objectors in the AL East wars, stopped their two game mini skid against the slightly crappy A's. Evan Longroia continued to demolish the ball in frightening new ways. The Internet's Boyfriend hit a home run to dead centerfield as well as a double off the very top of the Green Monster in helping his Rays run roughshod over the Boston Red Sox. My singing heart informs me Rocco Baldelli homered against his former club. The Dodgers won a game on the same day every other team in their division lost. Their magic number is down to 18.
Hey Goat, I Like Your Beard: Kiss your mother, eat some brunch, watch some excellent afternoon baseball like young southpaws Brett Cecil & Dallas Braden going head to head. Not a brunchman? Wake and bake with Timmy Lincecum against Jeff Weaver; loser must surrender his favorite Kyuss record. Rick Porcello can only pitch 5 innings tomorrow, his mom won't approve if he misses dinner (THEY LIVE TOGETHER CUZ HE'S SO YOUNG!) Adam Wainwright and Edinson Volquez going head to head is good any day of the week.
Enjoy your Sunday, we'll be back tomorrow with wacky videos of mice playing, preferably on treadmills with Yackity Sax underneath.