Massive Manny Medical Misuse Move: Manny Ramirez Suspended Fifty Games

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Manny Ramirez suspended fifty games for positive drug test.

Ramirez is expected to attribute the test results to medication received from a doctor for a personal medical issue, according to a source familiar with matter but not authorized to speak publicly.

With the suspension taking effect with tonight's game at Dodger Stadium, Ramirez will not be eligible to return to the team until July 3.

Okay, WoWies. Do your work and come up with a better headline using alliteration.

UPDATE: The Yahoo! fantasy sports server is currently getting slammed by tons of Manny owners scraping the waiver wires for scrub OFs and by me trying to propose trades for the fella.


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20 Comments

Great. Between this and Favre, I won't need to watch TV or look at the internet for a month.

Best part of this: the 'roids bomb blew up in Fran McCourt's face.

/actually kind of gross

Rob, you assume we know what alliteration is.

Let the hand-wringing begin!

WHO SORRY NOW MISTER MACCOURT? YOU HAD YOURE CHANCE WITH TO KEEP THE HERO AN YOU BLUE IT WITH THAT ZERO.....

Does this mean the McCourts will build those Little League fields, after all?

Dreadlocked Dingerman Delivers Dreadful Development. Dummy.

Tests Throw Tater Tot Twit, Two-Time Title-winner Towards Threshold of Triviality

Juan Pierre needs to stop snitchin'

Dreadlocked dumbass does dastardly drugs, doh!

Juan Pierre needs to stop snitchin'

Wahoo wins.

Also, nice Guy Clark reference PJ

Guy Clark needs to stop snichin'

Power Pitch Pulverizer Pees Poorly, Playtime Precipitously Plummets

Scott Boras says Manny tested positive for a drug he was prescribed by a doctor for a medical condition. In related news, I'm sorry I posed as a doctor and wrote Manny a prescription for Adderall.

Manny Masticates Mary Jane. Misses a Myriad of Matchups.

Dodger drones defecate dodger dogs in drawers

Leaves leftfield lacking lugubrious label. Loneywood?

Shticky Stick Prick (Picked by Mick Dick) Licked for Fix by Dr. Nick

Bountiful Boners Bounce Boneheaded Baseballer

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