Giants 7, Brewers 0: Ryan Sadowski's big league debut couldn't have gone any better even if it hadn't come on the same day he learned he was selected by President Obama to be the new ambassador to the People's Republic of Easter Island. Okay, that last part is a lie but he really did have himself a heckuva debut, Brownie. Sadowski pitched six scoreless innings, struck out seven Brewers, collected a hit, and would have gone further in the game had he not been bruised by a Ryan Braun liner. A line drive, not an old Catskills joke.
Phillies 5, Blue Jays 4: Hey, remember Brad Lidge? He's back, and driving Phillies fans' blood pressure through the roof again. Fella was called on to save his first game since his stint on the DL and promptly put the first two runners on base with a meager one-run lead. No matter, the Blue Jays played themselves out of the game with an Aaron Hill foul out, a pickoff, and the much-expected Vernon Wells groundout to end the game. HOW DO YOU LIVE LIKE THIS, BLUE JAYS FANATICS?
Rays 5, Marlins 2: So much for the Marlins hot streak. The Fredi Gonzalez Express derailed on its way to St. Pete and the team took three casualties in the sweep. By that statement I mean to say that the Marlins got swept behind the hot run differential action of the Rays, not that anyone actually died in the figurative train wreck. Except 93-year-old Hattie McPloid, the Marlins #1 fan in Opa-Locka, F-L-A, whose lifeless body slumped over on her La-Z-Boy when Jorge Cantu struck out in the first with two men on. RIP HATTIE.
Mariners 4, Dodgers 2: If the Dodgerdogs are so good, then why did they just lose four of six to the ChiSox and the Marinerds? No matter, let us not bury the dead but rather praise the victors. Adrian Beltre, who is set to have shoulder surgery that will keep him restin' and rehabbin' for a coupla months, went out on top by singling home a run in the third inning. Good luck to you, soon-to-be Creampuff. In other news, David Aardsma saved his 15th game in 16 opportunities which means that he is in danger of having more relevance than merely being the first player alphabetically in MLB history.
Yankees 4, Mets 2: I realize that Mets closer Frankie Rodriguez has a control problem, but I didn't realize it was a growing problem. With his team down by one and the bases loaded, K-Rod managed to walk a 57-year-old relief pitcher making just his third career plate appearance to put his team in a deeper hole. Ye gods. Mariano Rivera's first career RBI was the cherry on top of the sundae that was his 500th career save and 110th career save of four outs or more.