Hey, did you hear? The Mariners drafted a switch-hitting second baseman out of Baylor named Shaver Hansen and it turns out his dad is Stan "The Lariat" Hansen, a retired professional wrestler with the WWF! Naturally. Only a former pro wrestler would name his kid Shaver. It figures that something like this would go down while our resident fake sports expert Kris Liakos is off trekking through the mud at Bonnaroo. Let me muddle through this nonsense myself and figure this thing out.
Via the bastion of pro wrestling 'facts', aka Wikipedia:
Stan Hansen began his wrestling career in 1973 for his hometown promotion in Amarillo, Texas. He had initially taken up wrestling as a part-time job while trying for the Detroit Wheels, but he began wrestling full-time with the team's folding. Hansen first teamed with future partner Frank Goodish (who later became Bruiser Brody) in 1975 while in Leroy McGuirk's Tri-State territory.
He wrestled in the World Wide Wrestling Federation in the late 1970s, and achieved his first amount of infamy there by breaking Bruno Sammartino's neck; it was from this incident that both Hansen and promoters claimed enormous power for his Lariat move, although a botched bodyslam caused Bruno's broken neck.
Half the words in those paragraphs mean nothing to me. Really, it's like I'm reading German. Here's a video of Hansen and Sammartino sticking to the script and fake grappling:
Christ, it's like watching walruses mate.