Baseball Before Bedtime: Parachute Woman

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Here's what happened in baseball last night when you broke big in New Orleans:

Braves 11, Giants 3: Matt Diaz' two-run triple broke open a 3-3 game in what turned out to be a six-run seventh inning and youngster Tommy Hanson won his fifth game on the year against none losses. Fella tied the Braves mark for most K's by a rookie in a single game with 11 punchouts. Make that 12 punchouts if you count the drunken fan who attempted to grab Tommy's rosin bag after the kid emerged from the players' exit after the game was over.

Phillies 10, Cubs 1: Tater tots by the Phillies big three R's (Ryan Howard, Raul Ibanez and Ruiz, Carlos) carried the Fightins past Ted Lilly and the Cubbies. Chicago southpaw Ted Lilly allowed a career-high nine runs in four innings, seven of them earned, and totally ruined WoW commenter Jerkwheat's ERA and WHIP for his first place fantasy team. Noted Yankee fan Jack Nicholson was in attendance and wondered where the Phanatic got his wonderful toys.

Yankees 2, Orioles 1: Hideki Matsui's walkoff ding-dong helped the Yanks win their third straight game by a score of 2-1. Thanks to homers by Eric Hinske of the Yanks and Nick Markakis of the O's, all three runs last night and eight of the nine runs in the last three games were scored on a solo dong, which proves my point that Yankee Stadium encourages homers but actually doesn't encourage run-scoring nearly as bad as joke parks like Chase Field.

Astros 3, Cardinals 2: St. Louis starter Kyle Lohse made only one mistake all night but it cost him. Carlos Lee's three-run happy jack in the fourth inning put the 'Stros up for good on moon night. Nifty hats, you guys! With Joe Thurston on first in the ninth and the Cards down one, pinch-hitter Chris Duncan ended the game with a GIDP, proving once again that not every move that Tony La Russa makes is gilded with gold leaf and paired with caramelized Trix cereal.

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Tommy's average fastball speed last night: 94.

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