In Space, No One Notices You're 9.5 Games Back

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spaceinvadersshea.jpg In the last month or so, no one has noticed anything the Mets have done except for hilarious rants by the GM at press conferences. But not all is lost! NASA Astronaut Mike Massimino recently went up to space and took with him the Shea Stadium home plate, reports.

"We're allowed to take up items that are from organizations that are important to us," Massimino told "The Mets are great. They're tearing down their old stadium. What better way to represent a stadium or a ball field than home plate?"

Massimino, 46, is set to present the plate, returned from its 5.2 million-mile trip to space, Friday evening at a Mets game where he will throw the first pitch. [Editor's Note: He did this, apparently.]

"I'm a big baseball fan, I'm from New York, and the Mets were my favorite team growing up," Massimino said.

Newsday adds this quote from Massimino: "Getting to take a Mets home plate into space makes all the hard work it took to be an astronaut worth it." Really? I thought it was the whole going into space part of it that made all the hard work worth it.

We're in luck, too: Next week, a foul pole from Riverfront Stadium will be sent to the bottom of the Mid-Atlantic Trench.

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In September, that plate is going to crash into the ozone, destroying the atmosphere and causing all of earth to choke.

Massimino returned the plate and the Mets gave him Scott Kazmir in return.

Massimino only took the plate up because he's angling for Omar Minaya's job.

That's not going to help Ollie's confidence. "And that ball four missed by ... 2.6 million miles."

WHY IS ROLLIE MASSIMINO IN SPACE!?!?? He's too old for that nonsense.


After he conquered Stussy and No Fear in the Great T-Shirt wars of 1993, space is all he has left.

Massimino was distraught when his freeze dried ice cream kept slipping off his poorly thought out excuse for a dinner plate.

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