My Bed Is Covered Yellow: Today's Afternoon Games

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All games are Eastern Daylight Time, except the Pirates/Rockies tilt which is occurring in an alternate dimension where space and time have ceased to exist:

  • Rangers at Indians, 12:05PM: Cleveland has a tidy 14-7 record since July 21st. Maybe if they'd played baseball at such a high level since April, my prediction that they'd win the Central wouldn't look so ridiculous. The Rangers need to win this rubber game to stay close in the Wild Card race and do so by asking Scott "Don't Call Me Josh" Feldman to throw a gem.

  • Royals at Twins, 1:10PM: The Twins rotation is so bad this month that they had to trade for Carl Pavano to be their ace. Carl pitched a short shutout over the Tigers last week in his Twinkie debut; without Pavano, Minnesoter starters are 3-6 with a 6.99 ERA this month. Hey Gardy, I heard Sid Ponson is available if you need an anchor in that rotation.

  • Tigers at Red Sox, 1:35PM: Which is more of a crime: that the Red Sox are about to complete a season sweep of the Tigers or that the two teams only faced each other seven times this year? Cy Young candidate Justin Verlander will try to prevent the Tiger oh-fer while Clay Buchholz looks for his first win in a month.

  • Padres at Brewers, 2:05PM: Things have gotten so bad for the Brew Crew that yesterday has been dubbed "Black Wednesday" thanks to the dismissal of hitting coach Bill Castro, the demotion of shortstop J.J. Hardy and the outright release of third baseman Bill Hall. If the Padres complete the sweep today, look for Bernie Brewer to be forced to enter AA. Walkoff Walk favorite Manny Parra looks for his fifth win since the All Star break.

  • Phillies at Cubs, 2:20PM: If you or anyone you know can identify this jamook who threw a beer at Shane Victorino, please contact your local authorities and let them know that you recognized a dude on the Internet. I'm sure they'll be thrilled. Cliff Lee takes the mound looking for the Philly sweep.

  • Pirates at Rockies, 3:10PM: I'm pretty sure this game isn't even being televised.

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Scott "Don't Call Me Josh" Feldman

I would have gone with "Don't Call Me Cory"

I would have said Scott "Don't Call Me A Texas Ranger" Feldman.

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