The Snowman in the Yard: Today's Afternoon Games

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A few games populate the schedule on this gorgeous getaway Thursday. Nary a hurricane in sight, so play on, gents!

  • Indians at Tigers, 1:05PM: Detroit is nothing but a paper tiger! Why else would they be starting Nate Robertson, a fella who hasn't posted a winning season since 2004 (when the team had a losing record) and a dude who manager Jim Leyland hopes can throw at least 80 MPH. What the what? Lucky him, though, it's only the Indians. Dee-troit goes for the sweep.

  • Brewers at Cardinals, 2:15PM: John Smoltz looks for his third straight stellar start for St. Lou and will do it against the miasmic Brew Crew. Hey, this National League thing is pretty easy, just ask Brad Penny. Walkoff Walk favorite Manny Parra toes the rubber for the Fightin' Ueckers.

  • White Sox at Cubs, 2:20PM: Interleague? In September? What the what? No big deal, both of these teams are about as far out of their respective playoff races as a one-legged man in a half-marathon. At least the weather in Chicago is nice today. Drink away, boys.

  • Mets at Rockies, 3:10PM: Colorado starter Jason Marquis looks to tie his career high in wins with his 15th today while the Mets are just busy looking for excuses to wear hilariously enormous hats. Jason Giambi was the pinch-hitting star last night for the Rox and most likely celebrated by swimming nude in a tank-ful of Coors Light.

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I think the 80 to 85 Leyland is talking about is pitch count, not MPH. Although, Jim saying, "We have some extra ammo now," is pretty obviously about buying a few cartons at truck stop Indiana.

Do any Indians fans every use the cheer "Goethe Fausto"?

Uh, yeah. What freetzy said. Especially since earlier in the article I talked about Nate throwing 90-91.

And trust me, it pains me to say anything positive about Nate Robertson.

"IT" talked about Nate, not "I".

Is that a blue Phillies logo on that snowdude?


I failed reading comprehension in fourth grade.

In my hood they call me Jeezy the Snowman

Isn't a Goethe Fausto a schnitzel sandwich with hot sauce?

For a moment there I thought I was through the lookingglass as Jerkwheat had been unmasked as Jason Beck. (And he would've gotten away with it too, if it hadn't been for those meddlesome kids.)

I forgot to mention that it turns out that Jerkwheat is actually Dr. Hillbilly and Jason Beck is the Iron Yuppie.

Via @Haudricourt on Twitter: "Brewers LHP Manny Parra, who enters game with 6.66 ERA, surrenders HR to first batter of the game, slugger Julio Lugo."

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