I Hear America Singing: Today's Afternoon Games

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Holy crap, today is the last weekday afternoon of the regular season. I don't want to sound like a hopeless sap but sheesh, this season has scooted along way too fast for my liking. I'd liveglog the Twins and Tigers for you but with Carl Pavano ringing the death bell for Minnesota last night, what's the point?

  • Cardinals at Reds, 12:35PM: Need more evidence that the National League Central is a wasteland of losers? The Reds, at 44-32, are just one game behind the Cards for best intra-division record. With a win today against Chris Carpenter, the Reds will tie that up, will sweep the champion Cards, and will own a 9-7 record against St. Louis on the season. Looks like Catshirt was right about the Reds being a surprise team this year; they could still win 80 games and have some of that 'momentum' heading into 2010.

  • Twins at Tigers, 1:05PM: With a win today, Detroit will wrap up the AL Central crown and plan their flight to New York for the ALDS next week. Kudos, Tigers, for entertaining the Michiganers, but you still couldn't save Saturn. Scott Baker the Mediocre Start Maker will do his best to preserve the Twins' season, but dragging Nick Punto's corpse around should prove to be way too much hard work.

  • Brewers at Rockies, 3:05PM: The NL Wild Card race is all but over, but a win here by Colorado will finally crush the Braves collective trachea. Too graphic? Well imagine this: if the Rox win today and sweep the Dodgers this weekend, Jim Tracy's boys will win the NL West and send Joe Torre out to Philly for another neck-stomping. It's baseball, the clockless game, where drama sneaks up on your self-satisfied ass when you least expect it.

  • Diamondbacks at Giants, 3:45PM: Their season is all but over but San Francisco manager Bruce Bochy won't go down without getting his stud pitcher a second consecutive Cy Young award. Tim Lincecum faces Brandon Webb DAN HAREN OOPS in a real sexy pitchers duel. Webb HAREN has a 216:37 strikeout to walk ratio; Lincecum's is 254:66. Webb HAREN DAMMIT and Lincecum both have 14 wins. I'd vote for both of 'em over the Cardinals duo. In fact, I will support whoever pitches better today in my awards post next week.

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13 Comments

ugh

This whole entry made me puke. Sorry for soiling the comment section.

America is singing Bon Jovi because it lost a bet with Australia Grant Balfour's ERA+.

Spanish from Old School > Bon Jovi > Frank Caliendo > Dane Cook

Just to be clear, I fuckin hate Bon Jovi but I hate him less than those other two d-bags

pssssssssst its Haren not Webb

By all means, contribute your comments regarding the DET-MIN game in this here post because I have no afternoon content with which to entertain you.

Yeah, Brandon Webb threw exactly 4 awful innings this year before Creampuffing himself so badly that he might miss time NEXT YEAR, too. Imagine if you traded Miguel Cabrera for him in your keeper league because you had lots of hitting depth but not much pitching? Boy, I bet you'd be mad as heck. Other people wouldn't care, most likely.

Chris Carpenter just hit a grand slam. That's how you campaign for a Cy Young.

Does anyone else get MLB Network updates on facebook? If so read some of the comments. Worse than yahoo.com comments.

I thought facebook was for prepubescent girls?

/quickly signs up for Facebook

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