Dennis Haskins Enters HOF Before Bert Blyleven

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wow.haskins.jpg When you work at the Baseball Hall of Fame, you must get to see your fair share of celebrities. Baseball is the national pastime, after all, and its Hall of Fame is considered hallowed ground. Sure, Cooperstown, N.Y., isn't near anything1, but it's the Baseball Hall of Fame. I hate everything and I thought that place was amazing.

Apparently not, though, because the Hall of Fame's communications director wrote as if Jesus (or at least
Ivan de Jesus) showed up at the HOF when a visitor from Bayside High showed up:

The man with the Boston Red Sox hat was walking up the Museum's grand staircase alone, wearing that awestruck look of most Hall of Fame visitors. He asked for directions to the new Hank Aaron exhibit, then broke into a smile.

"Thanks! This is great. By the way, I played Mr. Belding on 'Saved by the Bell.' I'm Dennis Haskins."

This is amazing. I can only imagine Dennis Haskins reminds the staff of every museum he visits he played Mr. Belding. Maybe he also brings this up at bars2. Then again, I do hear about him more often than, say, Lisa Turtle3.

There's nothing wrong with getting excited to meet Mr. Belding. I plan on doing it myself in Reading on June 23. But does one have to pen heroic epics about the guy?

Soon, Haskins' time ran short. He stopped in the Museum Store before slipping back out onto Main Street. And with that, he was gone.

I can't tell if this is about Mr. Belding or Brigadoon.

1 Except the Cardiff Giant, on display at the Farmers Museum in Cooperstown. Also in town: The dude from 3rd Bass.
2 Maybe? Pfft. You know he brings this up at bars.
3 Lark Voorhies played Wanya's girlfriend in the music video for Boyz II Men's "On Bended Knee." I'm not sure; that might have been her last acting role.

Incidentally, this got me thinking: Who has had the least successful career, post-Saved by the Bell. Then I realized this is easy: The answer's Dustin Diamond. But let's rank them anyway!

  1. Zack (Mark Paul Gosselaar): A major role in NYPD Blue, he was on that TNT judge show that was okay, and honestly Dead Man on Campus had some good jokes. This one is pretty obvious, though the stupid hat I saw a photo of him in while researching this list made me want to put Slater in the top spot out of spite.
  2. Slater (Mario Lopez): Un-fucking-fortunately, he's had a somewhat successful career as a host of crappy entertainment, plus he was runner-up on Dancing with the Stars. Maybe he should be No. 1? He's the host of Extra, though, and you wouldn't put Mark McGrath No. 1 on a list of members of Sugar Ray.
  3. Kelly (Tiffani Thiessen): Several failed TV projects, a largely unsuccessful stint on Beverly Hills 90210 and a lot of terrible plastic surgery (conjecture). Oh, Kelly. What happened?
  4. Jessie (Elizabeth Berkley): Showgirls, and nothing else. Oh, and apparently her face is frozen in this position?
  5. Lisa (Voorhies): Uh, that Boyz II Men video? She was in a couple of sitcoms for an episode or two and a Star Trek: Deep Space Nine episode. But at least she wasn't...
  6. Screech (Dustin Diamond): Obviously he's had more work than some of the people above, but.. I mean, he went back to Saved by the Bell: The New Class. And his other work: Dustin Diamond Teaches Chess, Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling (he finished fourth; Dennis Rodman won), Celebrity Fit Club, et cetera. Worst of all, he released a sex tape.

I don't know where Mr. Belding fits on this list, nor do I know where to put Stacey Carosi (Leah Remini)! According to her Wikipedia page, Tori (Leanna Creel) is a wedding photographer who got gay married in California in 2008. Neat!

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Slater (Mario Lopez) does deserve to be number one, mostly because of his starring role on "Pacific Blue." Seriously, how did you forget to mention that fact? It's like I don't even know you anymore.

Also, Cooperstown is home of Brewery Ommegang (actually about 5 miles south). Excellent beer. Check it out.

I work in a theater in NYC, and Dennis Haskins came to see one of our shows. Swear to God, he mentioned that he had played Mr. Belding THREE times in the 30 seconds it took him to pick up his tickets.

I have attested to this before, but Dennis Haskins is completely fucking crazy. And he was in an episode of It's Always Sunny in 2005.

Oh yeah, I forgot about Ommegang, they have great beer. I emphatically did NOT forget about Pacific Blue.

Jesse was a hooker in any given Sunday

Tiffani Thiessen is currently on the show White Collar on USA. She's not bad, but nothing she ever does will ever compare to Kelly Kapowski. Ahh sweet memories.

Lark Vorhees was in the classic Redman and Method Man comedy How High

She should move up based on that alone.

If we're measuring success by pure cash flow, Leah Remini has got to be the winner. Homegirl has done what, 43 seasons of King of Queens? You know she's getting syndication points. Oh and she was in Old School. Plus, she's a hyper-Scientologist, and you can't get to that level unless you have lots of money or are an alien, I think.

No mention of Max Alonzo? For shame.

Torii Spelling did alright for herself.

Tori I mean. Damn you Torii Hunter's mom for making me misspell the name Tori

Best. Tangent. In. A. Footnote. Ever.

Technically, the correct spelling is Torre.

One Easter Sunday a few years back I was belligerently drunk at the Dome when the Yankees were in town. I was sitting 3 rows behind the Yankee dugout. Torre came out to make a pitching change and I yelled “You suck Torre” loudly three or four times. I got a bunch of looks from people in the crowd because Torii Hunter was up and they thought I was yelling at him and because I was really drunk at 2:00 on a Sunday afternoon.

I didn't know Lutherans were allowed to drink on Sundays. Learn something new...

I skipped church that day

"Did you just say 'WE stepped out of the shower'?"
"I said 'he'."

WTF is "Georgia"?

Ray Charles I believe

I met Dennis Haskins once, and now I go around and tell everyone "Hi, I'm Nick. I met Dennis Haskins, who played Mr. Belding on Saved By the Bell."

Is that why your wife married you?

UU - I get a bunch of Ommmmmegggggggganggggggg beers out here in the Bay Area at my local BevMo.

Awesome stuff.

You should put a heist countdown on the site, like ESPN did with the NFL Draft.

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