Opening Day Lineupstravaganza, Rockies @ Brewers, 2:10PM

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It's a very memorable day in Milwaukee! Today marks the first time in baseball history that two teams have started their season with a game featuring pitchers named Yovani and Ubaldo. That is, unless you count 1914's Federal League opener between the Baltimore Terrapins and Brooklyn Tip-Tops that used starting pitchers named Yovani "Twelve Fingered" McGillicuddy and Ubaldo "Happy" Finneran. But nobody ever counts the Federal League.

If the Brewers really do end up losing 90+ games in 2010, you can always look back to today's Opening Day lineup, see the names "Gregg Zaun" and "Jim Edmonds" and wonder why, oh why, did a team so set on contending employ gentlemen who haven't been relevant since the 1990s.

Okay, that was just wrong of me. Gregg Zaun has never been relevant.

By the way, this game started an hour ago but you probably didn't notice. Nor did the thousands upon thousands of drunken Wisconsinites in the stands at Miller Park wondering why the Brewers' mascot no longer slides into an ginormous mug of beer.

Carlos Gonzalez, CFRickie Weeks, 2B
Seth Smith, LFCarlos Gomez, CF
Todd Helton, 1BRyan Braun, LF
Troy Tulowitty, SSPrince Fielder, 1B
Brad Hawpe, RFJim Freakin' Edmonds, RF
Chris Iannetta, CCasey McGehee, 3B
Ian Stewart, 3BGregg Zaun, C
Clint Barmes, 2BAlcides Escobar, SS
Ubaldo Jimenez, PYovani Gallardo, P

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They abandoned Bernie's Sudsy slide because it was affecting the children or something. Oh and Bernie had horrible cirrhosis of the liver.

That really should be his nickname. Jim "Freakin'" Edmonds!

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