Orpheus Plays The Bronx: Today's Afternoon Games

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  • Rangers at Indians, 12:05: It's David Huff vs. someone named M. Harrison. Come strapped in case the M stands for "Marvin". I guess you'll need a gun if the M stands for "George" too because he'll be a zombie.

  • Red Sox at Twins, 1:10: Hey Minnesota. Nice park. But are you ever gonna play a goddamned night game in it? The Red Sox have been in the 6th inning everyday when I've gotten off work this week. "Oh the cold weather won't affect anything, that's a myth... blah blah." TURN THE LIGHTS ON AND PLAY A NIGHT GAME IF IT'S SO BALMY THEN. Wakefield vs. Liriano.

  • Houston at St. Louis, 1:40: The Astros are stiiiiilllll looking for their first win of the season, and will trot out the excellently named Bud Norris to try and get the job done. A loss today would match their franchise worst 0-9 start in 1983. Back when Mike Scott was a still a ladykiller. Catch Brad Mills fever! Cardinals send out Kyle Lohse.

  • Brewers at Cubs, 2:20: Jesus Jeff Suppan returns from the deel to face Carlos Zambrano and the Cubs. Fukudome has quietly put together a first week and a half, going 10 for 24 with a tidy .773 OPS. Zambrano turned in a decent performance in his last start lowering his ERA 40 points to 11.

  • Nationals at Philles, 3:05: Is there a more fun TV station name to say outloud than MASN? Try it. The Phillies have been a juggernaut thus far scoring runs by the handful. The Nationals try and stop them with Scott Olsen and Philly counters with J.A. "Is Mighty" Happ. Tune in Phillies fans, it's more fun than doing your taxes.

  • Mets at Rockies, 3:20: Mike Pelfrey against Jorge De La Rosa. SMELL IT.

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35 Comments

You don't need to tell me to, I can smell it all the way from Philly.

Is there a more fun TV station name to say outloud than MASN?

YES!

Apropos of nothing (but what is here?), Doug Glanville's ESPN.com headshot is fantastic.

http://search.espn.go.com/doug-glanville/

Woo-hoo, down by two in the seventh, the Tribe is going for six in a row.

Ebessan: Fantastic. Doug might be trying too hard, though? I don't really care, though, he's a much better analyst than most of the other 4500 guys who talk about baseball on TV.

He looks like he's contemplating the set design for a Sapphic Erotica video.

Soo-Choo had your taunts translated to him in between innings, Chief, and feels as though you have disgraced his family. He has answered your call, but only this once.

I'm kookoo for Shin Soo Choo!

Great pitching performance by This Tweet in Baseball's own David Huff, Chief. Complete game!

Wow, Rangers-Indians wrap that game up in a tidy 2:03. Joe West just made a mess in his pants.

I was on the MLB.com scoreboard, and all of a sudden a window popped open and offered a live look-in on the Sox-Twins game. Awesome. Does anyone know if this will continue all season? For FREE, I mean.

@njpanick, I'm sure it will go away like the free highlights yahoo fantasy baseball is offering.

@Nick
Did you see the Red Sox IBB Mauer just to have Morneau drive in a run on the next AB and have Mauer score on the AB after Morneau?

Frankie Liriano giving the business to the Sox tepid lineup is making my friggin' day.

BCTF, I'm on your side today.

If only Ortiz were playing today,....Liriano's SO total would be higher.

It's the first home game of the year that I am not at.

Nick,
My baby girl went to both games and it went great. I highly recomend a baby bjorn for carrying your child. It makes it a lot easier to drink when your hands aren't full

BC-

Good to know. My bro-in-law gave me theirs, and my first thought was "no way will I wear this Nordic papoose," and my second thought was "well, it could be handy at the ballpark." Glad to see someone put it to use.

The Swedes make shitty furniture but they make great sweaters and baby carriers

Nick,
One more thing. Check out the locations of the family bathrooms at CBP. It's a lot easier change your baby in private with the both of you there. Plus if it's raining, it's a good place to work on baby #2

When my dad was in college, he spent a year abroad in France. During that time, he went on a ski holiday to the French Alps and wound up spending the better portion of it with a pair of comely Swedish lasses. Long story short, one of them knitted him a bad-ASS ski sweater and sent it to him. After he passed, I took possession of said garment. It's got deer and snowflakes and everything. It's unironically awesome.

DAD BLOG 2010

@BC
Noted. I heard the restrooms at US Cellular are spectacular for that sort of thing.

Rob,
The first couple of years it seemed like a lot of wowies were getting married. This is what happens next. Like the song.

Kris and I will never get married! Of course, that's mostly because my state won't allow it.

I USED TO PLAY CATS AND THEIR CRADLES FOR MY OL MAN ON OUR WAY TO THE FATHERS DAY DEER KILLIN BUT THEN ONE DAY I FOUND OUT THE SONG THAT MEANT THE SUN MOONS AND PLANETS TO US WAS A TRUE BLUE RIP OFF OF CHARLIE CHAPLIN OR SOMETHING AND IT HURT DEEP DOWN INSIDE SO I KNOCKED THAT NONSENSE OFF RIGHT QUICK

I can't believe CHIPPER just linked that song... *shudder*

CHOOOOOOOOOOO!

Just want to second the props for baby bjorn.

CHIPPER = ZMF

Discuss.

Somehow I don't think that Chipper is a down with ZMF.

OH, you mean this ZMF.

God, all you people are old.

/generation Y'd

If ZMF is a WoWie, is that better or worse than finding out that Diablo Cody wrote some highly mediocre posts on Fire Joe Morgan?

http://www.firejoemorgan.com/2005/08/doing-john-kruks-research-for-him-vol.html

I may not have an Academy Award, but at least I've never had several thousand readers scan over my blog posts while looking for a JoeChat!

I think that that's a good thing, at least.

Danys Baez has a pitching motion like a drowning hamster.

I really hate him.

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