Mariners Band Together Against Media, Possibly At Sleepover

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wow.sleeplessinseattle.jpg Well! It appears the tale of Ken Griffey's alleged clubhouse nap just won't end.

Last night, after winning his first game of the season, Cliff Lee wouldn't speak to the press until the reporter who broke the story left. That'd be Larry LaRue of The News Tribune of Tacoma, Wash., who stands by his report.

Mike Sweeney, yesterday, told that "nothing is going to divide this clubhouse, especially a makeshift article made up of lies."

Meanwhile, a source told ESPN's Tim Kurkjian that, in a players-only meeting, Griffey cried over the incident. Man, he falls asleep during games and he cries when retelling it? He really is old.

Whatever the facts of the whole story, the Mariners are using a time-honored tactic for a team in turmoil: Band together against the media! As The Office's Michael Scott once said, "Sometimes what brings the kids together is hating the lunch lady."

Editor's Note: The Photoshop at right is maybe my laziest one ever. I barely even cut out Ken Griffey Jr. even close to correctly, and the fonts don't match, blah blah blah. I believe it's time for a nap. Kris, can you wake me up in time for another post later in the day? Or at least don't anonymously tell Big League Stew I was sleeping on the job.

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During the meeting, the boys ordered pizzas and were going to watch Saw IV and V, but Kanekoa Texeira was too scared, so they had Ichiro put on a fashion show instead.

Does this make Sweeney Rosie O?


Sweeney doesn't have enough balls to pull that off.

I know we live ina 24 hour media cycle and what not.

But jesus this is the most overblown nonsense.

Some player who doesn't play much may or may not have fell asleep and may or may not have missed a pinch hit appearance.

If the players name was anything other than Griffey, it wouldn't even be a story. It shouldn't even be one.

But Matt, it's a human interest story! I mean, let's face it - who among us hasn't entertained thoughts of falling asleep on the job?

...OK, yeah, you're right. It's overblown nonsense. BUT STILL!

I agree, Matt. Which is why I've written about it three times already! Er, wait.

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