Jerry Seinfeld is the Jewish Ralph Kiner, Hates Lady Gaga

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Multi-billionaire comedian Jerry Seinfeld must be bored now that his awful NBC show about awful people in awful marriages is on hiatus. The lifelong Mets devotee has decided it's time to ruin televised baseball, too. Tonight, the once-funny nudnik takes to the Mets broadcasting booth for a few innings to make some Angel Pagan jokes and, hopefully, shame Keith Hernandez on live television.

Seinfeld's wife, Jessica, must need to get her noodge husband out of the house because she was the one who contacted SNY, the Mets-owned TV network, to try and get Jerry a spot calling a game for a night. Sure, they said, how much worse can he be than that schlemiel Ron Darling, who will get the night off.

Jerry will pair up with old pal Keith Hernandez, who memorably guest-starred in an episode of "Seinfeld" where he played a man desperate to dye his grey moustache, or something. I bet Keith is going to come prepared with some cheesy shtick in an attempt to hold his own with Jerry, but in the end, we'll all be schvitzing uncomfortably at home. Stick to the analysis, Keith. We're not amused by you.

In other massive Jerry Seinfeld news, the comedian questioned the chutzpah of pop sensation and WoW favorite Lady Gaga. She and her pals crashed Seinfeld's empty CitiField luxury box after flipping the bird to photogs at a Mets game earlier this month. Seinfeld, sounding like an total nebbish on WFAN yesterday, was none too amused:

"This woman is a jerk. I hate her. I can't believe they put her in my box, which I paid for ... You give people the finger and you get upgraded? Is that the world we're living in now? It's pathetic. And why is she giving the finger? How old is the finger? How'd it even get to be the finger? Somewhere along the line somebody decided this is the bad finger."

"You take one 'A' off of that and you've got gag."

"I don't know what these young people think or how they promote their careers. I'm older, you know, I'm 56. I look at Lady Gaga the way Keith Hernandez watches these kids when they pull the pocket out, they wear the inside-out pocket. ... Do you think he could understand that? He can't understand that. That's a new game, that's kids."

And what's the deal with ballpark food?


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11 Comments

Who are these people and why aren't they getting off my lawn?

And she wore a bra as a shirt! A bra is not a shirt. You can't just put a bra on and then a jacket over it, that's madness! What kind of topsy-turvy society are we living in where it's ok to wear lingerie as outerwear? Whaaaaat's NEXT???

Keith H. would never have worn an inside-out pocket. That's where he kept his cocaine.

These pretzels are making me tsame.

/has Jewish friends

Bruised and refused

He's just pissed because she looks better in a puffy shirt than he does

How did that picture get made without Autograph Rob in it?

Lady Gaga was the second spitter!

(What's a guy got to do to get a "almost all of my TV references are at least 10 years old" tag?)

Hey Jerry,
Way to be completely irrelevant. Go make Bee Movie 2

BCTF has never heard of either of these people.

Massively important fact that I omitted: tonight is "Mets Fans Go Gaga for Wright" night at CitiField.

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