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- White Sox at Indians, 12:05: Manny was with the White Sox but didn't play. He also didn't answer any questions from reporters in English. I think the latter the awesome but don't fully understand the former. It aint the All-Star break here, Ozzie. The White Sox won anyway on Man Of The People Aj Pierzynskijfdhih's 3 run tater tot. Manny was in the on deck circle, either ready to pinch hit or trying to get a tan. Chicago goes for the sweep today as Freddy "Blech" Garcia takes on Carlos Carrasco.
- 2:20, Cardinals at Astros: IT'S THE IDIOT CURSE OF GLEN BECK. The Cardinals have lost the first two games of this series 3-0, and lost 4 overall since their manager and best player attended the annual meeting of the He Man Immigrant Haters. They're seven games behind Cincinnati and 4 games out in the Wild Card. Good. Today it's the horrible Jeff Suppan against Nelson Figueroa.
- Pirates at Cubs, 2:20: It's my day off and RuPaul is on the Rachel Ray show in man clothes. He's really tall and has a mustache. Kinda looks like Ray Allen. Also, he's been famous for like 20 years now, hasn't he? Good for him, I like him. These two teams suck.
- Phillies at Dodgers, 3:10: Since arriving in Philly, Ol' Roy Oswalt has been as good as anybody in the league. In his last few starts he's even been the best Roy on his team. Theres rubber involved in today's matchup, along with Philly's tenuous 1.5 game wild card lead over the Giants. Oswalt shut out the Dodgers in his last start against them. Clayton Kershaw goes for the Dodgers. He's striking out nearly 10 per 9IP but Philly's been better at avoiding the whiff this year. Should be a good one.