It's the last week of the regular season and our favorite players are doing one of two things: either getting ready for the playoffs or trolling strange cities looking for some good local eats. Or, if you're Paul Maholm, you're watching golf. To each his own, I suppose.
So let's take one last stroll down the boulevard of broken tweets in the latest edition of This Tweet in Baseball!
There were actually about 13,000 people at the park, but hey, this is a guy who struck out 118 times this season. It's not his fault his eyesight is garbage.
Pity poor Hunter Pence and his fourth place Astros team. Pence joined Houston a couple years after they won the NL pennant and has yet to drink from the postseason chalice. To add insult to mediocrity, Pence and his teammates probably should have chosen the Cincinnati Marriott instead:
A's pitcher Brad Ziegler has decided not to cross the thin green-and-yellow line this year. He won't post hilarious photos of Oakland's rookies dressed up in what I can only assume are S&M gear and Wonder Woman costumes. Shame. But at least Brad has enough of a sense of humor to share a picture of his own rookie hazing costume.
What is it with MLB rookies oversharing on the Twitters? It seems like all the veteran players on Twitter have some poor schmuck sending out boring social networking missives but the rookies, man the rookies just want so desperately to be loved that they'll tweet anything and everything. Just like Reds hurler Sam LeCure:
But even more than they like talking about hair product, these baseball youngsters simply love talking about food and drink, including our old friend Chris Coghlan, who might be ingesting a bit too much soy during his rehab:
On to Atlanta, where the Florida Marlins just came off a sweep at the hands of the streaking Braves. I don't know who this Giancarlo character is or what he does for fun but I'd sure like him and his sauce to stay as far away from me as possible. Mike Stanton, though, disagrees:
Later, Stanton gets a hankering for a toasty sub sandwich so he whips out his smartphone and dials up the local Quiznos. Because I know when I'm in a strange city, the first thing I want to do for lunch is walk eight blocks away from my hotel and eat a sandwich that will almost instantly induce a case of explosive diarrhea:
Dope lol, indeed. Braves superstar rookie Jason Heyward knows the score in the ATL, though. He doesn't mess around with those nasty sandwiches. Nah, he goes straight for the good stuff: