I Am Going to Crash Nick Swisher's Wedding

| | Comments (14)

As per the gossipy rag the New York Post, Yankees fan favorite Nick Swisher is getting married to actress Joanna Garcia in Palm Beach, FLA on Saturday. Well, isn't that a coincidence because I, too, am headed down to Palm Beach this weekend to attend a wedding! Sure, the wedding is for a future in-law and not Mr. Swisher and Ms. Garcia but that does not preclude me from crashing the big event, due to be held at the swank Breakers resort on the oceanfront.

So, what other celebrities (besides me) will be in attendance, gossipy rag?

Guests at the nuptials will include Yankee pitcher CC Sabathia, Jamie-Lynn Sigler, former boybander Lance Bass (who'll be one of Swisher's groomsmen) and Cameron Diaz. But it's unclear whether Diaz will attend with Alex Rodriguez, whom she's been seeing on and off since the summer.

Sounds good, but I wonder if any of his How I Met Your Mother co-stars will be in attendance. I've always wanted to tell people How I Met Neil Patrick Harris.

Also, what is that thing in their engagement photograph above? A baby kangaroo?

(hat tip to Upstate Underdog for filling us in with the info)

PREVIOUS: Luke Scott Is No Regular Nut, He's a Birther Nut With a Gun!   |   NEXT: Merry Christmas from Your Pals at Walkoff Walk


What kind of jerk crashes a wedding?

"Many of Swisher's teammates will be at the lavish affair, but sources say Derek Jeter -- who just signed a $51 million, three-year deal -- isn't expected to be among them."

Why even bother crashing it, Jeter won't be there. However, Lance Bass will be one of the groomsmen. Seriously, Lance Bass is a groomsman.

She should stick with the red hair. It's a very good look on her.

@BCTF, but do the curtains match the carpet?

I would suspect she has hard wood floors

Good thing there's a cold front passing through FLA right now, or else Sabathia would sweat through his suit before he even got a whiff of the cocktail weenies.

First thought: Was she in Wedding Crashers?

Second thought: Did she show her boobs in Wedding Crashers?

Answer is "no" to both if you are on the same thought train as me.

I'm going to crash Rob's wedding. All the capicola, mortadela, and pasta fagiloi you can eat!

Not EVERYTHING is an Old Country Buffet, UU.

No but seriously good luck finding Rob's wedding. His entire family is of such short stature that they will be holding the reception in a rabbit warren.

So much to say here.

First, I AM crashing Rob's wedding. WoW tradition demands it. UU you can contact me for details.

I have spent time with NPH. He thinks I am a truly awful person, and with good reason.

And no way Rob crashes swishers wedding. he's not a True Yankee.

The password is "Rob and Kris say hello."

This is met by 5 minutes of awkward silence until the groom realizes who the fuck "Rob and Kris" are.

@phillas, you are a legend. It almost makes me want to get re-married so you can crash the wedding.

@Chief, I'll keep it mind.

ZOMG these NYPost comments:

12/09/2010 12:21 AM
trying Getting a Clutch Hit in the Playoffs then tie the Knot..Mutt..Hope he is traded

12/08/2010 11:06 PM
Jeter's publicists keep hinting at a Jeter wedding to keep the Bass rumors at bay.

12/08/2010 11:05 PM
Jeter isn't attending because he has been romantically linked to Lance Bass for a couple years and a picture of them together could be too damaging. He's trying desperately to stay in the closet at least until his career is over.

12/08/2010 8:22 PM
Oh no...a guy with a nickname of Swish has Lance bAss in his wedding party? I think I'll skip the bachelor party...

12/08/2010 8:14 PM
Way to go Swisher. There is only one nickname for him and that is - Sweet!!!

12/08/2010 6:46 PM
why no Jeter? what ever happened to his wedding last month?

Vladimir Andreevich Makogonov
12/08/2010 5:38 PM



12/08/2010 4:54 PM
Good match he's a great guy and she is also a great person. I have never heard anything negative about his future wife. Many blessing sent to the couple.

Leave a comment